Poetry // The Invitation by Oriah

This is a bit too intense for a wedding ceremony reading, but man, I love it. 

The Invitation

by Oriah

It doesn’t interest me
what you do for a living.
I want to know
what you ache for
and if you dare to dream
of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me
how old you are.
I want to know
if you will risk
looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn’t interest me
what planets are
squaring your moon…
I want to know
if you have touched
the centre of your own sorrow
if you have been opened
by life’s betrayals
or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain.
I want to know
if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.
I want to know
if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you
to the tips of your fingers and toes
without cautioning us
to be careful
to be realistic
to remember the limitations
of being human.
It doesn’t interest me
if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear
the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.
I want to know
if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
“Yes.”
It doesn’t interest me
to know where you live
or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.
It doesn’t interest me
who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the centre of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.
It doesn’t interest me
where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know
what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.
I want to know
if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like
the company you keep
in the empty moments.

Wedding Dress Search: The gowns that were almost The One

Ok... you've seen the "weird" ones...the ones that were gorgeous but offbase for various reasons. Today I'm showing the contenders, the dresses I seriously considered. Here goes. 

(btw, the Reem Acra above is pretty... but was never really in the running. I'm not a fan of dropped waists...even if they're dropped only by an inch.) 

THE CUTE EDITORIAL ONE

This was cute but also subversive, unblingy but also luxuriously, meticulously made. Maybe you could call it adorkable (my Kleinfeld stylist would tell you no, please don't call it adorkable). This dress felt the most "me" as I am everyday, as opposed to my nebulous Bride Persona. Amsale Lake Gown. Similar here (I want this one as a rehearsal dinner dress).

The OVERGROWN V-NECK

Pretty! And with such a nice, soft, flowy skirt. Though, what a difference skin color makes. Ivy & Aster Secret Garden. 

THE APPLIQUE A-LINE

I grabbed this one even though it was exactly what I didn't want: the princessy puff. But I couldn't resist the floral applique detailing and beadwork on the bottom (a kind of starry beaded connect-the-dots that you can't see here). From the short time I was in it, I could tell it was also a comfy dress, one you could dance, eat, and hug in. BHLDN Ariane Gown. Similar here (actually, very very similar, such that the Ariane is likely a direct rip-off and ultimately why I didn't want to go with a company that's known for doing this to indie designers). 

THE DAISY CHAIN BUSTIER

This dress amused me, with its sweet daisy straps and neckline... and then a bustier bodice and SEE-THROUGH side panels (yes, I am wearing black underwear in this pic). This had a Rihanna-esque pretty but DGAF attitude. The fit is a bit off here...the cups weren't really cupping the right areas... but you get the idea. Tara Keeley 2501 Gown.  Similar for everyday here.  

THE WEEPING WILLOW

You've seen the Glamour Closet dressing room a lot. That's because my like-to-try-on ratio was very high here. They carry A-list designers (Vera Wang, Elie Saab, Naeem Khan, Reem Acra, Carolina Herrera, Mira Zwillinger, Lela Rose)... but because the dresses are all samples or discontinued styles, they're 50-75% off. Maybe that's why I liked so many of them, too. 

Anyway, that means that the selection can be a little oddball and the good, au courant stuff (plunging V, illusion necklines) goes fast. This Oscar de la Renta had the sweetheart/strapless/ballgown look that I was avoiding, but the leafy applique bottom made up for it. This was the first dress where I did that happy skirt swish you see before a bride gives the word on Say Yes to the Dress. Oscar de la Renta 44E16.

The Simple Slink

Ah, and you thought I was all botanical appliques! This looks body-con in a potentially worrisome way, but in fact this whole genre of dress is pretty flattering. There's no boxy top, just a heavy skirt that pulls on a clingy bodice that's little more than illusion netting, flesh-colored cups, and lace. Instantly form-fitting, with enough weight to smooth out your curves. Martina Liana 775 Gown.

Which brings me to...

The BETTER-FROM-THE-BACK dress 

This Maison Signore shares the same basic mechanics as the Simple Slink dress, except there's more lace, more sheer panels, and more butt-hugging. Those Italians sure know how to treat and appreciate a woman's body (to the tune of 1.1K likes when this pic was reposted on Maison Signore's Facebook page. Yikes!). I couldn't find the exact dress online, but this Maison Signore is close. 

Reminder... I already have my dress. Have you guessed what it looks like now? (Here are all the posts in the series if you need to catch up.) A slightly kooky comfy sheath with botanical appliques and minimal bling? Sorry, but that's not how it worked out. 

What was your favorite dress? 

Wedding Dress Search: The ones I'd love to own, but aren't right for the occasion

Last week I showed you the "weird" ones, the dresses that had a unique POV. Those were dresses that I'd wear to a fashiony event. 

These dresses are more versatile... beautiful, glamorous gowns that are pretty much without fault. It's not them, it's me...and our venue...and that gut reaction of "this is pretty and I want it, but not for the wedding." 

The photo above is the Kelly Faetini Bree dress. I went into this whole dress saga knowing that I didn't want a strapless gown with a sweetheart neckline. So we added lace arm bunting (not the correct bridal term) and it transformed the dress from pretty but mildly forgettable into something with a more sultry silhouette. The thing about side bunting is that your arms are literally on lace leashes. You can make the bunting detachable, but then you're at sweetheart/strapless square one. 

THE CHUNKY LACE COLUMN 

Funny thing about wedding psychosis. You go in thinking you want a certain kind of unfussy, unblingy dress. A normal dress that happens to be white. This BHLDN Catherine Deane gown fits that description. It's easy, elegant, botanical. But somewhere along the line, I convinced myself that the dress needed to be more Bridal (I'll take my kool-aid on ice, thank you). And so this one was a miss. BHLDN Jolie Gown. (Also, curiously, available in navy for $500 more... you'd think it'd be the other way around, but maybe they are constructed differently.) 

THE LEAFY COLLAR 

A long-sleeved wedding dress? So chic. And one with pretty but not precious appliques? I'm sold...almost. I'm a mover and a stretcher, and if I'm going to wear a dress for 9+ hours, it should be pretty comfortable. Despite reassurance that I would not "hulk out" of this dress, I had to take it out of the running. Rue de Seine Roxy Gown. Similar here and here.

The GATSBY MERMAID

I would get this dress in a heartbeat if we were getting married in a ballroom or loft space or restaurant. Anywhere but a garden. The cut and weight of the beading is ridiculously flattering. In the picture above, I'm not trying to mimic the model (I hadn't seen the photo yet). I'm just wondering where my tummy went. Victor Harper Couture 289. Similar here.

THE VERY SEXY WORK DRESS 

I told my bridal salon stylist that this looked like a very sexy work dress and she asked me..."where do you work???" (From home, so what do I know.) Maybe it's the cap sleeve and hardy lace. Or maybe it's my questionable work attire (when I used to work in an office). This had a nice ease to it and the back was also killer, but it didn't have the air of specialness I wanted. Alyne Adella Gown. Similar here and here. 

Btw, you already know this... but you can pin a million pics on Pinterest, but you have to put the dress on! These don't even look like the same dress to me. 

THE RIBBON LATTICE WATERFALL 

If you can divorce yourself from the mania, you might be able to see: these dresses are works of art. Tony Ward is a Beirut-based couturier who uses the most unusual fabrics. I tried on a dress with a modern/romantic Chantilly lace-meets-Pollock. Another with a skirt pinched with floral ridges, like engraved silk. This was a lattice of ribbon that criss-crossed over the bodice, then flowed into a round, full skirt. Up close, this is a stunner. Tony Ward Astagale Gown. Similar here. 

Oh, and guess what?? I got my dress this past weekend! I went with my mom to Schone Bride, a mere 12-minute walk from our apartment and conveniently close to Four and Twenty Blackbirds and Fletcher's. Do wedding dresses go with pie and barbecue? Not really, but between those two places and its Brooklyn DNA, this salon and The Dress feel right. 

I'm still planning on posting other pics... dresses that were almost The One, and possibly "dresses that looked good on models but look terrible on me" ... but come to think of it, not sure why I would do that last one. 

We have a wedding caterer!

I care about food. People know I care about food. People I care about...care about food. So wedding catering is a huge decision and was a bit stressful (though tastings were a ton of fun). 

I'm happy to report that we officially booked our caterer, Birchtree Catering!! Here's what won us over at our tasting. 

Striped vegetable canapes - chive bread, salted cucumber, French breakfast radish, creme fraiche, dill 

Like high tea in a garden. Which is exactly the vibe we're going for in our venue.  

Hen of the woods tarts - Kennett Square mushrooms, house ricotta, pecorino, caramelized onion, herbs 

The only thing worse than perfunctory carbs is perfunctory pastry. You know, that greasy cup that's clearly just a vehicle for whatever's inside. Find me at a cocktail party and I am the shameless person with the plateful of licked-clean pastry. Well this was not that. The pastry was fresh, an essential player rather than a boring stage. 

Chicken shumai with lemongrass and malagueta chili oil

I like the idea of including some Chinese flavors in the menu, if only because they are cozy and familiar to me. But my mother, who doesn't mince words, says if my family wanted Chinese food, they'd go to a Chinese restaurant. 

Lemon capon with roasted lemon, almonds and oven roasted olives, with ricotta gnudi and winter greens 

Capons are the eunuchs of the poultry world. The lack of sex organs result in a less gamey taste (but who ever said chicken was gamey?) and meat that is more moist, tender and flavorful than hens or un-castrated chickens. Probably TMI. 

Anyway, true to its breeding, this was super tender and flavorful. The lemon and olives brought acidity and bite. The gnudi was a surprise too. When I think of gnudi, I think of April Bloomfield's ricotta clouds. As my dad said, these were like mini knishes (high praise for him). 

Smoky hanger steak with demi-glace, roasted sunchokes, frizzled maitake mushrooms, charred baby rainbow carrots 

I know this plate looks kinda empty. But keep in mind, this is a tasting portion and we are really really stuffed by now. This was a solid meat dish, but we'll likely go with a red meat selection with more pow (like the skirt steak with chimichurri) or perhaps the bourbon braised short ribs. 

Food is the most important deciding factor, but we also knew Birchtree was the one for us because of their care, competence and culture fit. Even their office in Global Dye Works reminded us of 195 Morgan, where I worked from 2010-2012 as the Marketing & Events Director of 3rd Ward, and where Dave works now, in a weird coincidence (different company though). 

Now we have to figure out our service style (family style? plated? a hybrid) and finalize the menu. I have an image of no centerpieces...just giant platters of vibrant, delicious food. Flowers are great, but they're no food. 

Introducing...Author Website Services

I'm not gonna name names, but some author websites are so bad. So, so bad. 

Patterns and colors that hurt your eyes. Layouts that feature all the wrong things. Weird effects that are just glitchy and annoying. 

And the thing is: many of these are custom, expensive sites that can't easily be altered by the author. So when you're paying a designer by the hour, you're stuck with a website that's either a money-suck or an embarrassment. 

I didn't want that for myself. So I built my site -- this site -- all on my own, using what I've learned as a marketer, creative director, and community director. I thought about what I would want as a modern, design-conscious author. Color, clarity, personality. 

Once I had my site built, I worked on numbers-based marketing (analytics, ad buys, email capture), as well as content marketing ("sticky" recipe and publishing posts, content partnerships, product collaborations, community cultivation). 

Turns out, I like this side of the author life and other people in the publishing industry told me that my approach was on the money. They wanted to know if I could do the same for them or their clients. 

Well... now I can. Starting today I'm offering Author Website Services. My core services are website design, branding, and debut author launch strategy, but I can do any of the stuff I listed above. You can learn more and reach out to me here. 

And seriously. Say no to bad author sites! 

Wedding Dress Search: The Awesomely Weird Ones

I've lost count of how many dresses I've tried on. I've been to twelve bridal salons (one of them twice). Tried on an average of eight dresses at each. Really ... over 100 dresses?? 

If you said that to me two months ago, I would have thought that was insane. Are dresses really that different? Yes, they are. Very much so. And if you let yourself believe that this dress is the MIDOYL (Most Important Dress of Your Life), then the pressure is very on. (I've chosen to believe this, though I recognize you can be way more chill and will not live a lifetime of debilitating dress regret.) 

D and I decided that he wouldn't see my dress until the day of the wedding, so don't expect to see The One here or on Instagram. But, man, I have SO MANY others to show you! 

Today's post will be...the weird ones! If you know me IRL you know that I like to experiment with fashion and have been known to wear very directional things: turbans, a leather breastplate, puffy armored boleros...you get it. 

I'm naturally drawn to quirkier styles and in bridal, these designs can be so refreshing amongst a sea of sweetheart/strapless cupcakes (no offense to those, they are lovely, but not for me). 

Here are some delightfully weird dresses that I would love to wear if I were, say, doing an editorial shoot. They're just a little too funky for our wedding and my somewhat traditional fiance and family. 

The Fin-de-Siecle Dress

I dug the debauched, deconstructed glamour of this. A little Moulin Rouge, a little garbage pail after you've had a cold. Monique Lhuillier Bouquet Gown at Glamour Closet. Similar here.

The Sexy Jane Austen

A sheer-paneled silk taffeta powder blue gown...with pockets! This had the right mix of sexy/sweet/avant-garde...but for the wedding itself, I think I'd have to line the sheer elements, which kinda takes away what makes it so great. Schone Bride. Similar here, here, and here. 

The everything's-coming-up-roses

Would you believe this dress is practically weightless? Those silk rosettes were so touchable and the cowl neck is such an unexpected bridal neckline. Lakum Suzanne Gown at Schone Bride Trunk Show. Similar here and here.

The Textural Marvel 

This Carolina Herrera had amazing 3d flowers made of petal-like sequins at the waist and shoulders. Everytime you looked at it, there was something new. The super-soft overlay and lace met chunky, crafty detailing. Art teachery vibes, almost Marni-esque. Carolina Herrera Cassidy Gown at Glamour Closet. Similar in black here. (wow those model arms, yeesh)

The Boho Muppet

There are plenty of times when I'd want to look goofy and muppet-like. But probably not my wedding. Temperley Leigh Gown at Glamour Closet. Similar here and here.

I still don't have a dress and the timeline is as tight as can be. Made-to-order gowns can take 6-12 months to make, then alterations take another 1-2 months. (Yes, this is crazy!) We are 7 months out. Defcon 1 ("nuclear war is imminent") as my visibly distressed Kleinfeld consultant told me. 

Truth is...I think I know what dress I want. I'm just letting it marinate a little to make sure I love it tomorrow and the next day and hopefully forever. 

I won't show you that dress until after the wedding...but I already have more wedding dress search posts planned: Gorgeous Dresses I Want But Not For a Wedding, Dresses I Thought I'd Love But Look Terrible On Me, and Dresses That Were Almost The One. 

What do you think of these dresses? Would you go "weird" at your wedding?

Los Angeles Eats: Sqirl in Silverlake

New Yorkers visiting LA, here's a tip. On your first couple days, don't worry about adjusting to the new time zone. Get to Sqirl early -- it opens at 6:30am for drinks and pastries during the week, and the kitchen heats up at 8am. No line, just morning light and the best breakfast in your recent memory. (Or in my case, maybe ever??) 

I like breakfast/brunch as a social event, but as a meal, it's not my thing. Pancakes and waffles knock me out for the rest of the day. I love eggs, but they get boring easily. Benedict, omelette, with a side of bacon (even if it is maple-glazed, submerged in a Bloody Mary, thick cut from a heritage pig...) Meh. I'd rather have an interesting dinner plate. 

But Sqirl! I will fully admit that I'm a sucker for avocado toasts and chicory lattes, handmade almond milks and jams. But even D who is wary of anything hyped and twee loved it. We went twice over four days. 

Here's what Mark Bittman said of Jessica Koslow's cooking in the NY Times: 

Instead, it’s a kind of gentler version of dinner food, with little or no meat, but often with eggs and seasonings from the southern and eastern Mediterranean and much of Asia, and yet somehow, in the end, quite American. Nothing is bland or insipid, and much of the food is laced with a sharpness that comes from lemon juice and hot sauce and garlic and pickled things. For breakfast food, it’s downright revolutionary. 

Yep. We're used to breakfast "notes": cheese, potatoes, hollandaise, bacon, buttery carbs, maple syrup. But what Koslow brings is something else entirely. 

Take the "Green Eggs and Jam", caramelized onions, creamed spinach, wild arugula, and a toad in the hole in Clark Street Bakery bread. It's addictively savory, without crutches of cheese or pork. The bread is key, soft and pillowy, just a whisper of sour. Each bite hits on every register from sharp and peppery to sweet and slow-cooked. 

And then there's the sorrel bowl, with Kokuko Rose brown rice, sorrel pesto, preserved Meyer lemon, lacto-fermented hot sauce, pickled radish, sheep's milk feta and poached egg. I won't go into the hot sauce, pickles and feta, which are riotous players that add heat, brine and funk. But preserved lemon! What? The flavor -- sour, bitter, salty -- makes this breakfast one for the books. The sorrel adds an apologetic weedy note (not marijuana...the other type of weed, jeez). 

The avocado toast (top) presently features JJ's avocados, hot pickled carrots, green garlic creme fraiche, wood sorrel, and house za'atar. This is served all day (as opposed to the breakfast items, which are only available 'til the leisurely hour of 4pm).  I'd venture to say this is the oddest avocado toast I've ever had, and that's a good thing...like I've been listening to flutes and clarinets -- sweet, mellow, easy -- and finally someone plays the oboe -- sharp, strange, memorable.  

Here's the "Famous Damus", soft scrambled egg, Surryano ham, chives, ciabatta. We liked this one, though it's definitely more familiar in flavor than our other dishes. 

Sqirl also serves lovely drinks and pastries. The almond milk is made in-house (so no worrying about weird emulsifiers). 

This has become our dream wedding cake flavor combo: chocolate with blood orange. The best part? The crackled cacao nib crust. 

Sqirl historians will know that it actually started as a jam business. If we went a third time, I'd surely get the burnt brioche with almond hazelnut butter and jam. Instead, I have two jars at home: the rather romantic-sounding Moro Blood Orange and Tonga Vanilla Marmalade and Rhubarb and Meiwa Kumquat Jam. I can't wait to try them in yogurt, on ice cream, or let's be real, by the spoonful. 

Word to the wise -- jams are considered liquid and cannot be taken in carry-on luggage! I learned this the hard way. The TSA woman at the Long Beach airport saw me go from okay to grief-stricken in record time. Don't do that. 

Book Club Bites Readers Edition: Lavender Peach Macarons from Lena's Lunchbox

"We had ordered the shaved ice and candied tropical fruits, the curry ice cream with mini brioche puffs, and the lemon basil profiteroles with blueberry-oatmeal brittle. But a small army of servers brought out even more: chocolate fondant sandwiched in coconut crisps, cinnamon apple churros with maple syrup tapioca, chocolates, macarons, marshmallows. Felix delivered the petit fours himself, and whispered to me, “I’m sorry for the delay with the truffles. Try the lavender-peach macarons. They’re my favorite.” Then he smoothed his bangs back and gave me an extra-long look that made my hair stand on end." - Food Whore, Chapter 14

This scene at Tellicherry was one of my favorite to write. This is Tia's first on-the-job dinner with Michael Saltz and there's something fishy about the service. So many desserts, each more delicious than the last. 

This actually happened to me when I ate lunch with Tim Zagat as an intern at Zagat Survey. We ate at Jean-Georges and the desserts kept coming, a seemingly endless parade. 

I'm so glad this scene resonated with others, including Lena of Lena's Lunchbox who made an IRL version of my fictional creation.

Aren't they gorgeous??? See below for the full recipe and check out Lena's incredibly creative and playful recipes (I'm partial to the Big Mac(aron) and the Brown Sugar Honey Cake with Carrot Ganache and Crushed Honeycomb). And -- get this -- she's only 16. Next Christina Tosi anyone?

---

photos and words from Lena's Lunchbox

baking with lavender always makes me feel a little weird. it has a lovely taste, but using even a quarter teaspoon too much can quickly make a flavor go from ‘delicately floral’ to ‘hotel soap.’ in this recipe, finely ground lavender buds add character to the simple, meringue-based macaron cookie, and any soapiness is offset by a filling of assertive cream cheese frosting and bright peach jam.

these cookies were inspired by jessica tom’s food whore! in the book, the main character works as a secret assistant to the new york times’ food critic. their cover is blown while dining at a super nice restaurant called tellicherry, and the waiter brings them plates upon plates of desserts to try to leave a good impression: curry ice cream with mini brioche puffs, cinnamon apple churros with maple syrup tapioca, chocolate fondant sandwiched in coconut crisps, and lavender peach macarons!  it was one of the more mouthwatering chapters.

read food whore and make these (4 star) macarons!

macarons (adapted from entertaining with beth)

• 3 egg whites, room temperature
• 50 g (1/2 cup) granulated sugar
• 1/4 tsp cream of tartar
• 1/8 tsp salt
• purple (or red and blue) gel food coloring
• 120 g (1 cup) almond flour
• 200 g (2 cups) powdered sugar
• 2 tsp dried lavender buds

filling

• 4 oz cream cheese
• 1/4 cup (1/2 stick) butter, softened
• 2 cups powdered sugar
• 1/4 tsp kosher salt
• 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
• 2 tbsp heavy cream or milk
• peach jam

line two baking sheets with parchment paper. beat the egg whites in a stand mixer fitted with the whisk attachment until frothy, about a minute. add the sugar, cream of tartar, and salt, and turn the mixer to high speed. whip for 8-10 minutes, or until very stiff peaks have formed (think seattle space needle). add the food coloring, making the color a little darker than desired (it will fade as the macarons bake).

combine the almond flour, powdered sugar, and dried lavender in a food processor. pulse until the lavender turns to powder, then sift the mixture through a fine mesh sieve into a medium bowl. discard the larger almond pieces that remain in the sieve.

gradually fold the flour mixture into the egg whites with a spatula. be careful!! undermix and the macarons will be lumpy and cracked, overmix and they’ll be flat and won’t have feet. about 60-75 turns of the spatula when folding is the right amount of time. the batter should be thick but runny.

transfer the batter to a pastry bag fitted with a medium round tip. the easiest way to fill the bag with batter is to 1) twist the end of the pastry bag nearest to the tip (this prevents batter from leaking out before you’re ready), 2) place the bag in a large drinking glass and fold it around the rim, then 3) pour the batter in. pipe one-inch rounds onto the parchment-lined baking sheets, then rap the sheets on the counter to pop any air bubbles. let the macarons sit, untouched, for 30-45 minutes. this allows them to develop a skin; when they dry out, they’re forced to rise up and not spread out, giving them the trademark macaron “feet.” they should be tacky to the touch, but not stick to your fingers. during the last 10 minutes of letting them sit, preheat the oven to 300º.

bake for 20 minutes. don’t open the oven door while they’re baking. remove and let cool on pans for 20 minutes, then remove to a rack.

for the filling, beat together the cream cheese and butter in a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment. after a few minutes, add the powdered sugar, then the vanilla and salt. beat for 5 more minutes. add the cream and beat for one more minute. transfer the frosting to a pastry bag fitted with a small round tip.

to assemble, pipe a circle of frosting around the edge of half of the macarons. fill the hole with peach jam, then sandwich another macaron on top. makes 30 sandwich cookies. 

Thank you so much Lena!

See more Food Whore-inspired recipes here. Do you have a Food Whore-inspired dish you want to share? Email me at jessica@jessicatom.com and I'll feature you here.

Parsing the Per Se Review

There is one fewer 4-star restaurant in New York. The NYT review of Per Se: https://t.co/D8Lf9A8D3B pic.twitter.com/q1EuoGVMOR

— The New York Times (@nytimes) January 13, 2016

Last Tuesday, my Twitter feed read like this: tributes to David Bowie, the State of the Union, and the one that beat everything—Pete Wells slaughtered Per Se in the New York Times, downgrading Thomas Keller's Central Park temple from a vaunted four stars to a humiliating two.

If I didn’t already write a book about this exact scenario, I’d be inspired anew. In an age where we discover restaurants on Yelp, Instagram and blogs rather than crusty old media, why such a frenzy? Even people who have no desire to dine at Per Se are weighing in. How come?

We might not look to the New York Times as the final word on a restaurant’s worth, but restaurant reviews matter for other reasons: 

#Laksa #Kuching Breakfast of the Gods

A photo posted by anthonybourdain (@anthonybourdain) on May 28, 2015 at 6:57pm PDT

·       Chefs may be rock stars, but critics are the real idols. When people eat for sport, their idols aren’t really chefs. Of the hundreds of thousands of people who have posted about the #cronut, how many have followed Dominique Ansel's recipe and spent the three days to make it? My guess: next to none.

 But critics! Those professional eaters: Anthony Bourdain, Andrew Zimmern, Gail Simmons, Jonathan Gold, Ruth Reichl, Kate Krader. They travel the world, savoring the world's most extraordinary cuisine. Let's be real, though critics insist eating for a living is a tough gig, it sure beats the antiseptic office jobs most of us have. We’re fascinated by critics—their power, their disguises, their company credit card—and, if we’re being honest, we probably want to be them.

·       Restaurant happenings are deliciously dynamic and gossipy. In certain cities, among certain circles, restaurant blogs are like sports pages and reservations are courtside seats. We track where chefs are headed, what places are shuttering, the debut of a chicken sandwich/veggie burger/bone broth menu. And when a four-star restaurant is stripped of half its stars, that’s the stuff of scandal.

Mr @pete_wells before you try to destroy a restaurant like Per Se + others, you show know the odds of owning one @DanielBoulud @ChefBianco

— François Payard (@francoispayard) January 14, 2016

·       Critics are not normal journalists, so it’s easy (and fun) to theorize on their motivations. People treat reviews like literature or Supreme Court rulings, reading between the lines. Does he have an ax to grind? Is she cozy with the chef? Why such spiteful language? Whether he likes it or not, a critic reveals more than the meal in his writing.   

A naïf might assume reviewers are objective and fair, that they come to the table with no biases. But what is a review except for a written declaration of bias? There are clear fails (a hair in your soup, a delayed dish), but the rest is pretty subjective. Where's the line between too salty and well-seasoned? Aloof and respectful of your space? “Limp and dispirited" and elegantly draped? The decision comes down to perspective, a plate through the lens of personal experience. After all, one man's bong water is another man's ambrosia.

·       There may be more voices, but that doesn’t mean there’s more criticism. Instagrams tend to be fanatical and food porny (like flies, it’s easier to attract “Likes“ with oozing honey rather than vinegar). Yelp has a star system, but there's no standardization. Per Se has 4.5 stars, but so does Cheesecake Factory.  For a measured, informed, and trustworthy review, you'll have to look elsewhere.

A critic is like a personal trainer. We might not love them and often they spoil the fun. But sometimes we crave that rigor. Critics—good ones—are immensely knowledgeable and aren't afraid to call out bad form.

·       Restaurants are about status. We read reviews to see how the other side lives, to imagine an existence in which we can afford to spend $3,000 on a dinner for four. Maybe you enjoy the absurdity, a la Real Housewives. Or you're incensed by the social injustice. Or perhaps you pin this experience to your “Someday” dream board.

NYT Per Se review reveals a world so different frm my own I feel Ive glimpsed another planet https://t.co/mQczLXnbkM pic.twitter.com/TsSmXaSMQP

— travis lupick (@tlupick) January 13, 2016

Many of the Times' most iconic reviews touch on wealth and entitlement. Ruth Reichl's dinner as herself and her Midwestern alter ego “Molly“ at Le Cirque. Sam Sifton's takedown of Lavo, where bankers dine as a prelude to clubbing. Pete Wells and his surprising admiration of the anti-Per Se, Señor Frog's.

New York City runs on money and access disguised as art, style, and culture. Prime Hamilton tickets, the latest Mansur Gavriel bag, an 8pm at Polo Bar. It's exhilarating or exhausting, depending on who you ask.

In his book, How to Lose Friends and Alienate People, Toby Young recounts a conversation with his boss, Vanity Fair editor and man-about-town Graydon Carter. It's called the “Seven Rooms Theory" and postulates that in cities across the globe there are seven connected rooms, each more exclusive than the last.

"You think you've arrived, doncha?" he said. "I hate to break it to you but you're only in the first room." He paused. "It's not nothing — don't get me wrong — but it's not that great either. Believe me, there are plenty of people in this town who got to the first room and then didn't get any further. After a year or so, maybe longer, you'll discover a secret doorway at the back of the first room that leads to the second room. In time, if you're lucky, you'll discover a doorway in the back of the second room that leads to the third. There are seven rooms in total and you're in the first. Doncha forget it."

 When we hear that a lofty restaurant like Per Se is “among the worst food deals in New York“, we can breathe a sigh of relief. Perhaps the things/meals/jobs/lives we strive for aren't worth the anguish and feelings of inadequacy. For the moment, we can be satisfied with our current room. At least for now.    

The 2015 #FoodWhore Awards

Confession: when I first thought of possible cover designs, I was inspired by Instagram. You know, all those flat lays of beautiful fruit, on a pristine white background. I pictured something super tactile, a little messy, vibrant, exotic but relatable. 

Did I think people would take that cover and create their own Instagrams, often with food? Maybe? I didn't really think about it, in the way a restaurant might create a dish that screams Instagram fodder. 

But, now, looking at readers' #FoodWhore Instagrams is one of the best surprises and rewards of publishing a book. There are so many great ones, but here are some that made me heart-eye emoji like mad. 

Best Food Pornographers

Oozey, gooey, sticky bites that hit on all our pleasure points. Food whore indeed! 

A photo posted by #feedyoursoull (@feedyoursoull) on Oct 27, 2015 at 9:37am PDT

A photo posted by Food Porn Share (@foodprnshare) on Nov 19, 2015 at 9:27am PST

A photo posted by @foooodieee (@foooodieee) on Dec 21, 2015 at 10:52am PST

Best Beach-Envy Shots

Author life: sitting in leggings in Brooklyn. Reader life: lounging on a tropical beach. Hm.

A photo posted by Tracy Memoli (@tracymemoli) on Nov 22, 2015 at 9:29am PST

A photo posted by Unbuttoningpants.com (@unbuttoningpants) on Dec 8, 2015 at 1:14pm PST

A photo posted by The Brunch Brat (@brunchbrat) on Dec 27, 2015 at 7:19am PST

Best Flat Lays

'Grammers who make true art. 

A photo posted by Folded Pages Distillery (@foldedpagesdistillery) on Oct 16, 2015 at 6:02am PDT

A photo posted by Ursula (@ursula_uriarte) on Dec 21, 2015 at 5:55am PST

A photo posted by Liz Clayman (@lizclayman) on Dec 15, 2015 at 10:52am PST

Best Way to Start the Day 

Forget checking your email. Start your day with a book. 

A photo posted by Books are for sharing 📚 (@readthisnext) on Dec 22, 2015 at 9:08am PST

A photo posted by A Duncan (@slamduncalot) on Nov 8, 2015 at 8:11am PST

A photo posted by Deb Christensen (@debinhawaii) on Oct 29, 2015 at 8:09pm PDT

Best Putting the OOO in Food Whore

Like peas and carrots (or foie and Sauternes), donuts are the most common food to be posed with Food Whore. 

A photo posted by Natalie_wannes (@natalie_wannes) on Dec 21, 2015 at 7:38am PST

A photo posted by Lenmeistergram (@lenmeistergram) on Dec 9, 2015 at 7:39am PST

A photo posted by #satisfeed (@satisfeed) on Oct 28, 2015 at 7:12am PDT

Best Carby Delights

For the savory tooths among us... 

A photo posted by @clairesees on Oct 27, 2015 at 5:08pm PDT

A photo posted by THE SWEET LIFE OF LINA 🎈 (@thesweetlifeoflina) on Nov 21, 2015 at 12:53pm PST

A photo posted by Tom Nakanishi (@tnaka83) on Dec 16, 2015 at 7:34pm PST

Best All-Natural Sugar High 

... And those who go a little lighter. 

A photo posted by christine yi • NYC food+travel (@cy_eats) on Dec 2, 2015 at 8:58am PST

A photo posted by Pichet Ong (@pichetong) on Oct 23, 2015 at 10:41am PDT

Best Coffee Break 

I liked these a latte.

A photo posted by Krista Soriano (@kristaaa) on Nov 4, 2015 at 6:34am PST

A photo posted by Hungry Hipsters (@hungryhipsters) on Oct 25, 2015 at 10:05am PDT

A photo posted by Kaitlin (Carniv)Orr (@carnivorr) on Nov 19, 2015 at 8:33am PST

Best Sweet Teeth 

Because the book *did* come out right before Halloween... 

A photo posted by #EatingNYC: NYC Food & Travel (@eatingnyc) on Nov 6, 2015 at 10:30pm PST

A photo posted by POPSUGAR Love (@popsugarlove) on Oct 16, 2015 at 2:14pm PDT

A photo posted by @wmmorrowbks on Oct 29, 2015 at 1:16pm PDT

Best Nightcap

What's better than eating and reading? Reading then sleeping.

A photo posted by Taste The Style (@tastethestyle) on Oct 25, 2015 at 4:56pm PDT

A photo posted by abigail (@abigailfortunee) on Nov 18, 2015 at 7:03pm PST

Obsessed with #foodwhore by @jessica_tom! Makes me miss NYC... and makes me hungry every time I read it. 😁 pic.twitter.com/owhlAoBpi7

— Chelsea Foy (@lovelyindeed) November 19, 2015

Food Whore (and me) in 2015

I’ll stop saying this in a couple days (even I'm annoyed by it), but 2015 was a biggie for me. I’d been looking forward to my book release since 2009 (when I first started writing the book), or you could even say 2004 (when I first entertained the thought of becoming a novelist).

There were the blockbuster happenings, but also a lot of smaller (yet still cool) steps along the way. Here are some highlights.

JANUARY

“Hey Jess,

Happy Friday!

So Stefanie and I had lunch yesterday and got down to some serious brainstorming. And…we came up with something that we LOVE. Brace yourself. What do you think of: Food Whore – a novel.”

— - from my editor Chelsey Emmelhainz on January 30

My editor proposes changing the title from BAD TASTE to FOOD WHORE. I reply: “hahahahah you ladies are nuts.” (After a lot of thought / design mockups, I agree in February.) 

FEBRUARY

first pass design // the final design

I receive two possible cover designs. The first one -- a table covered in pomegranate seeds spelling Food Whore -- is strikingly on-point. We have no revisions except for the addition of two plates, adding texture to the tablecloth, and lowercasing WHORE on the spine. (The second one was nice, but depicted… a waffle?) Here's more about the entire cover design process. Yes, the designer placed actual pomegranate seeds on a table and photographed them. 

MARCH

With edits, marketing/PR ramping up, and a pestering feeling that this is my one-and-only debut novel and I need to give it my all, I leave my job at a hospitality startup and focus on the book full time.

APRIL 

I hand in final copyedits. Barring major issues (oops, that's illegal, that error dismantles the whole story) I can't change anything in the manuscript. 

MAY 

the line for my autograph (and I kept signing until after my timeslot)

a very organized woman prioritizes my signing

I attend my first book signing at BEA, the largest book convention in the US, and am insanely excited and a little bewildered. 

JULY 

Look what arrived from my editor @ck_femme!! The real-thing book covers, hot off the press. #foodwhorebook cc @wmmorrowbks @harpercollinsus

A photo posted by Jessica Tom (@jessica_tom) on Sep 22, 2015 at 3:00pm PDT

I receive cover mechanicals and see the back cover for the first time. 

AUGUST 

A photo posted by Jessica Tom (@jessica_tom) on Aug 13, 2015 at 4:59am PDT

I get engaged to my boyfriend, best friend, and unofficial book strategist in Aruba. 

SEPTEMBER

A photo posted by Jessica Tom (@jessica_tom) on Sep 9, 2015 at 8:30am PDT

Entertainment Weekly publishes an exclusive excerpt of a critical scene between Tia and Michael Saltz. Now things are cooking and more press hits follow. Behind the scenes, producers and film agents come calling. 

OCTOBER 

The book is out! A flurry of press follows, including this in PopSugar and this in the NY Post: 

A photo posted by Jessica Tom (@jessica_tom) on Oct 29, 2015 at 7:09am PDT

NOVEMBER 

My official launch party takes place at powerHouse Arena (my first choice venue, and in one of my favorite Brooklyn neighborhoods). Here's the full Q&A with my friend and host of Heritage Radio's WORD OF MOUTH, Leiti Hsu. And here's a 3-minute sense of the vibe: 

DECEMBER 

Food Whore is reviewed in the New York Times Sunday Book Review by none other than the actual New York Times restaurant critic, Pete Wells (!). 

A photo posted by Jessica Tom (@jessica_tom) on Dec 7, 2015 at 2:31pm PST

The review ... unnerves me. But the very next day, Variety makes it official: DreamWorks optioned the rights and Lisa Rubin is writing the screenplay. I had known about this since the week before launch, but couldn't tell a soul. 

What's next in 2016?? 

A wedding, some movie progress and more writing. I don't really believe in astrology unless it's convenient to me. Here's what's on deck for Aries: 

An abundance of energy and ideas will carry you through this year. 

Let's hope! Coming up next on the blog ... another highlight, but deserving a post of its own -- all the great #FoodWhore posts from this year. 

Food Whore ... the Movie! DreamWorks Lands Rights

Have you heard?? Food Whore is one step closer to becoming a movie!!!! 

I'll write a longer post about this later (things are a bit crazy now. Game: changed). But for now here's the announcement in Variety. 

DreamWorks Lands Jessica Tom’s ‘Food Whore: A Novel of Dining and Deceit’ (EXCLUSIVE)

by Justin Kroll Film Reporter @krolljvar

DreamWorks Studios has acquired the rights to the novel “Food Whore: A Novel of Dining and Deceit” by Jessica Tom, sources tell Variety.

The book was published this past October by publisher William Morrow. Lisa Rubin has been tapped to adapt the screenplay for the studio.

The story follows Tia Monroe, who after graduating college has every intention of taking the New York City restaurant scene by storm. But after a coveted internship goes up in smoke, Monroe is suddenly just another food lover in the big city. Everything changes when a legendary New York Times restaurant critic lets Monroe in on a career-ending secret: he’s lost his sense of taste. Now he wants her to serve as his palate, ghostwriting his reviews.

CAA brokered the deal on behalf of Tom. Tom is also represented by Stefanie Lieberman at Janklow & Nesbit.

Rubin is adapting the Gayle Forman best-selling novel “I Was Here” for New Line and is also developing an original feature for producers Anthony Bregman and Stefanie Azpiazu. She is represented by UTA and Brillstein Entertainment.

DreamWorks also recently optioned the yet-to-be-published Dennis Lehane novel “Since We Fell,” which the author is adapting for the studio.

To answer your quick questions: 
- Yes, I am crazy excited. 
- No, not sure when it'll come out.
- Sure, you can have a cameo. After I figure out mine first. :P

What else do you wanna know? Let me know in the comments! 

The #FoodWhore Holiday Gift Guide

You can’t go wrong with food-related gifts. From the lavish to the practical to the unexpected, a food gift covers all bases. Here are some of the things I have on my wishlist (er… I mean, what I’m getting other people).  

via Food52

Is there anything chicer than a white marble kitchen with copper accents? Short of a kitchen remodel (and maybe buy a house first), this serving board is the next best thing. $130-$150 at Food52

via La Boîte

La Boîte creates nuanced spice blends for top kitchens. Rose oil : perfume :: cumin : a La Boîte blend. I’m partial to MishMish N33 (crystallized honey, saffron, lemon, spices), Orchidea N34 (Sichuan pepper, lime, orchid root and spices), and Pierre Poivre (8 different peppers and spices). Here’s the full collection. Starting at $15, La Boîte

via West Elm

I thought of something better than white marble and copper. White marble, copper, and coffee. I live in a decaf/caf household with high coffee intake, so we can never have too many French presses. Bodum, $30-$60, West Elm

via Amazon

Can a restaurant be your favorite if you've only been there once and live 3,000 miles away? Gjelina is like your summer camp boyfriend... short-lived, long-remembered. Food Whore and the Gjelina cookbook had the same pub date and I think I was more excited about the latter. $19, Amazon

via Terrain

These petrified wood serving boards have so much character and are a nice break for when you're done with marble and copper. $78, Terrain

via Williams-Sonoma

A good gift-buying strategy. What does the recipient like? And what's the luxe version of that? Maraschino cherries are delicious, but dye-soaked child's play. Get this. $20, Williams-Sonoma

via Papa Bubble

The Papa Bubble store in NoLita is the most austere, semi-intimidating candy store I've ever encountered. But the candies! They are miniature masterpieces with delightful, if not totally thematically appropriate flavors. To whit: the Safari Collection: Lions (Mango), Giraffes (Passionfruit), Monkeys (Banana-Pineapple), Elephants (Coconut) and Zebras (Kiwi). Starting at $6.50, Papa Bubble

via Sakara Life

If the definition of a great gift is something that a person wants but would never buy for him or herself... then meal delivery from Sakara Life is a great gift. Single days start at $99 (three meals, two snacks, and morning and night water). But let's go all out and get the 20-day package, which includes model and Taylor Swiftian food like Turmeric Spiced Eggplant + Ginger-Lime Dressing and Protein Bagels with Cashew Cream Cheese. 20 days, $990

Bourbon and maple syrup ... two brown liquids that, together, turn into gold. $16, Dorset Maple Reserve

And of course... for the food-lovers on your list, might I recommend the Food Whore x Tilit apron and a book? I'll even sign it for you if you email me here. 

Other Ideas: 

A meal delivery subscription to Marley Spoon (example dishes: Cauliflower Steak with Almond-Olive Relish, Spicy Shrimp Tacos with Radishes, Cucumber and Chile), about $10.25 per person, per meal

Zingerman's Culinary Adventure Society, filled with global goodies curated with Midwestern heart, $175 per box

Assuming the recipient has a frozen stocking or you can keep it cold, Roberta's frozen margherita pizza (the best frozen pizza ever), freshdirect, $10.99

Sfoglini seasonal pastas in flavors like porcini trumpets and Bronx Brewery radiators, starting at $7

Beet ketchup from Brooklyn Beet Company, so much better than HFCS, $9

Pics from Thanksgiving 2015

Like Tia, my family celebrates with a semi-traditional Thanksgiving meal. There are some non-negotiable classics: turkey, sweet potatoes, brussels sprouts, cranberry sauce. Then there are Tom-family classics, curried beef samosas, foie gras, lots of veggies. Here's how I do turkey day. 

Whatever's on the menu, these samosas always steal the show. We call them "shambosh" -- wonton wrappers stuffed with curried beef and scallions, a bite-size Indian/Chinese ethnic makeup of Madagascar, where my mom was born. You might remember this wrapping technique from my Deep-fried Nutella and Raspberry Samosas video.  

I actually served these at my launch party, but told my mom to only bring 50. Otherwise, no one would eat the other food and it'd all go to waste. They are that good.

Pre-dinner we also snack on foie gras (yes, like Tia's family). I have family in Montreal and France and they bring us the good stuff. Not shown: shrimp cocktail. 

Meanwhile, my grandma and her buddies post up and play mahjongg. They play in a separate part of the house, but man between the tile clanking and lady cackling, this is very noisy (but isn't every Thanksgiving?). 

They play upon arrival, eat apps at the table, break for dinner, play again, break for dessert, then play again. One of the ladies won $97 and for some odd reason, they left $3 on the table when they left (presumably a tip???). The woman in purple is my grandma. 

Okay, dinner! Let's start with the proteins. 

My dad smokes the turkey in a jerry-rigged smoker in the backyard. It's basically one smoker that feeds into another smoker and though the house smells like a cedar shed for days, the turkey is tender, flavor-packed perfection -- even the white meat. 

We also ate roast beef (with gravy and dad's famous "horsey sauce"). These garlic-ginger-ketchup shrimp are on the table year-round, but they're great enough for a special occasion too. 

We got greens... brussels sprouts, zucchini, cucumber.

Pickled veg... a welcome sharpness during a rich meal. 

And some classics to round it out: cranberry sauce with Grand Marnier and orange peel, stuffing, sweet potato, marinated beets. Sometimes we have corn and I think at some point we had mashed potatoes, but they were phased out.

And now dessert! This is my domain. Depending on when I get in, I may do sides and dessert, or sometimes only dessert. This year, I got in at noon on Thursday (following a Frogger-like runaround with the Thanksgiving Day parade on 6th Ave), so just did desserts. 

I made these two from Pichet Ong's The Sweet Spot: salt and pepper cashew dragees with a sesame oil base note, and pistachio raspberry-rose cookies, a butter cookie fortified with cream cheese. 

This recipe came from Claudia Roden's The Foods of Spain: an almond chiffon cake with a whiff of orange and lemon peel that also happens to be gluten-free. The recipe headnotes tell me this is a Passover cake, but I liked the sound of it (and it was suitably light(ish)) so why not.

And my last contribution: an apple crisp from the Tartine cookbook. Despite its homeliness, this was the only dessert that was finished in full. You basically top apples with rounds of butter-saturated, cinnamon-scented dough. Over 90 minutes, the dough drips its flavor into the softening apples. 

Grandma brought a cream cake and we drank ice wine (another piece of Montreal in New York, I guess). 

My uncle's friend is also a major dessert contributor. Here's the oh-so-appreciated tropical fruit salad. 

And dinner and activity in one: creme brulee. 

Hope you had a great Thanksgiving too! Isn't it the best?

Happy Thanksgiving!

Life kinda crept on me and now here's Thanksgiving! I sadly have no designated turkey day recipes on the blog this year, but I will be cooking/Instagramming today at @jessica_tom. Follow me there! 

Made last night and shown here... shellacked cashew dragees, piqued by salt, pepper, and sesame oil. A recipe developed by Nicole Plue and included in Pichet Ong's excellent cookbook, The Sweet Spot.

Wishing you and your loved ones a happy holiday!  

Food & Art: An Afternoon in Chelsea Itinerary

Without trying at all, I always seem to end up in Chelsea. Probably because I lived in Gramercy when I first moved to New York, just crosstown. I’d creep over 23rd, then down to Union Square, and make my way west, always stopping at the same spots and always discovering new places on the way, too.

Every now and again, I like to take an afternoon or even a whole day to wander around the city. The French have a word for this person, a flâneuse (masculine = flâneur): the urban explorer, a connoisseur of the street.

Nothing clears my head more than a good walk with good food, art and some pretty clothes mixed in, too. If you have a free afternoon, might a suggest a trip to the west side?

Start at Jeffrey

(which doesn’t allow photos inside)

Despite what you might think from Food Whore, Bergdorf Goodman wasn’t my first luxury retail experience. I bought my first pair of designer shoes here in high school: wooden block-heeled Jil Sander sandals with thin navy macrame straps. I still wear them! (And no, it's not an accident that Tia's first designer outfit is also Jil Sander.) 

Jeffrey isn’t as avant-garde as Opening Ceremony or as blue-blooded as Bergdorf Goodman. It’s somewhere in between, which I like. A live DJ is there all day (but it isn't clubby) and the staff is nice. Fifteen years ago, the man who sold me the sandals mailed me a thank you note and I guess I've been hooked since. Browsing is totally okay! I do it all the time. 

Flowers at Chelsea Market's Mrs. Bloom's 

Make your way to Chelsea Market

I love that food halls are popping up all over NY (Gothamist has an excellent overview of the top ones as of November 2015 here). Chelsea Market is a first-generation food hall, and the one that I return to again and again.

Sure, there are tons of tourists there, but there are also a lot of locals, too. I buy gifts at Buon Italia, Chelsea Market Baskets,  and The Filling Station. Posman Books is theoretically a general bookstore, but slants food in this location. If I’m putzing around Union Square, Meatpacking, or Flatiron I always find myself here for a quick snack. When I lived closer, I’d pop by almost every weekend for groceries.

Here’s what’s going on!

EATS 

There's always something new to try. Here's just a fraction.

From Los Tacos No. 1: Carne asada taco with a corn tortilla. Zagat and Infatuation called them the best tacos in New York. The Daily Meal calls them the best tacos in America. 

And?? These are transcendent. I'm kicking myself that I haven't visited sooner. But nevermind. These are classic, unfussy tacos where everything is bringing its A game. I got the steak: deeply marinated with just the right chew to say it's not too precious but not so much you're wrestling. Salsa, guac (yes, I know it looks a little pasty here, but it worked), lettuce, cilantro, lime. But the thing that did me in was the corn tortilla, pressed to the platonic ideal thickness, around 1.5mm. Did I know this was the ideal thickness? No. But it just felt good and right, like the steering wheel of a sports car or the arms of your partner (aw). 

From Beyond Sushi: the Pickle Me, with six-grain rice, gobo, pickled daikon and carrot, avocado and carrot ginger sauce.  

I first discovered these at a party and they were gone in two seconds. They're beautiful, healthy, clean, and surprisingly filling/ texturally exciting. 

At Bar Suzette, you can get crepes that are sweet, savory or something in between, like this apple, brie and honey beauty.

I'm not sure anyone just buys Eleni's Cookies for themselves (too pretty, like walking out in full makeup/heels/dress when you should just be chilling in jeans). But they make cute gifts. 

How does Fat Witch do it? Their brownies are top to bottom, left to right the same consistency, as if they were sous-vided to the exact texture between cake and fudge. If you like some textural action, they also sell the castoff ends (one man's trash is another man's...) 

Liddabit Sweets makes thoughtful yet straightforward candies. Not yuzu lemongrass or tallegio truffle ... more like beer, pretzels, caramel. I love these honeycomb ones because they utilize negative space in the way the best candies do (think: Kit Kat, Ferrero Rocher, Aero). This is a sucking, savoring candy rather than a chomping one. 

 

 

 

 

Groceries 

What sets Chelsea Market apart from the other food halls is that it's not just a fancy food court. You can get your knives sharpened, pick up a picnic for the Highline, get gourmet ingredients (Food Network shoots upstairs and you'll sometimes see staffers getting ingredients in their chefs' coats). And unlike Eataly or Le District, which also sell cooking ingredients and home goods, Chelsea Market is, on the whole, actually affordable (as far as "gourmet" ingredients go in NYC). 

Rana makes fresh, playful pastas in a range of flavors and colors -- and in a tasteful way that (I'd assume) wouldn't anger Italians though. 

Dickson's Farmstand Meats is a butcher shop selling beef, pork, lamb and poultry. I also love their jerky and how that confit looks like the meat is covered in fluffy mashed potatoes but it's really covered in fluffy fat. 

You'll find a good percentage of people at Chelsea Market licking their fingers, poking at a lobster carcass from Lobster Place. Obviously a strong order. Short of going to Hong Hong Supermarket in Chinatown, I don't think you'll find a larger selection of seafood in NYC. The chowder and sushi is also great here. 

Buon Italia is my spot for random Italian goodies. Could be pasta or Doppio Zero 00 flour or Sicilian pistachios. Like a present for your pantry. 

Manhattan Fruit Exchange is the best. I've seen chefs start at the Union Square Greenmarket and then follow up here for additional items. It has everything, includinghe little things you'd be hard pressed to find at a general market: baby corn in baby husks, fresh crosnes, wine grapes. I get my whole spices here. 

CAFFEINATE

But wait! You didn't have coffee! Ninth Street Espresso is in Chelsea Market and is great, but you've been there awhile and you'll be back. Try Blue Bottle. 

The thing to get here is usually the pour-over, but I am impatient. In the summer, I like a shakerato (though to be honest, I have yet to find an NYC shakerato with the same fizzy body I had a couple years ago in Puglia (sorry that was obnoxious)). Come winter/fall I go for a latte. 

The guy ahead of me got this and I asked what it was. "A Gibraltar," the barista said, and I nodded, pretending like I knew what that was. "It's like a cortado," she said, because my knowing face sucks. 

But I don't feel too bad. The Gibraltar is an off-menu Blue Bottle invention favored by staffers: a double-shot of espresso and a bit of milk, served in a Libbey "Gibraltar" tumbler. 

And don't sleep on the pastries! They are an attraction themselves. Though NYC doesn't have the pieces of edible art that the SFMOMA once had, the pastries are ever-so-slightly unexpected: a Parmesan-fennel shortbread, stout coffee cake with pecan and caraway streusel, I opted for the coconut rocher, coconut shavings just barely bonded by a chewy/soft cloud of meringue. 

Head to the Highline

You're here and you should go. Again, it's slightly touristy and when it's crowded you will feel like shrub-gazing cattle... but it's also spectacular and so well-done. A NYC institution just as much as Central Park. 

Snake your way around the Chelsea Galleries

You don't have to plan anything... just wander. All you have to do is zigzag your way between 20th and 25th St (north and south) and 10th and 12th Ave (east and west). Here are some of the galleries and pieces I liked, but of course these exhibits are all temporary and will be different in a couple weeks or months. I also included some gallery press release copy because, like restaurant reviews, I love how one art (words) can be used to described another. 

Wolf Kahn at Ameringer | McEnery | Yohe
"...his signature palette prevails - alizarin crimson, thalo green, and dioxazine purple." 

Sheila Hicks at Sikkema Jenkins & Co.
"supple and flexible...to explore infinite possibilities in form and movement." 

Louise Fishman at Cheim & Read
"Brushed, scraped, layered and smeared....the grid itself seems torqued and unhinged."

Natvar Bhasvar at Cara Gallery 
"...both vibrancy and life, and in another sense, imminent or implied destruction." 

Jeff Koons at Gagosian Gallery
"...viewer and painting are reflected in the gazing ball...reunited for maximum sensory perception." 

Some gallery-hopping tips:

• Think of each gallery as its own mini museum with its own point-of-view. One gallery might have lush jewel-toned canvases. The gallery next door might have ten-foot barbed penis sculptures. You don’t know! And that’s the fun.

• You’ll surprise yourself and discover new artists. With the exception of music that’s played for you (on the radio, at an event), we rarely encounter art with a completely blank slate. We’re geared to learn and research, to pay attention to the pre-hype. But when you’re wandering galleries, you probably won’t know who’s showing where so you’ll just get to consider/appreciate the art in a clean, unprejudiced way. Do you like it? That’s all that really matters.

• After the Chelsea Market crowds, Chelsea galleries will feel positively cavernous. Sometimes you will walk into a gallery and you won’t see one person, or just one person who doesn’t even look at you. Enjoy it! There are few places in NYC where you can get solitude and beauty in equal measure.

• I know it can seem intimidating to walk into a gallery, especially if there aren't many people inside. But don't worry about it. Art needs buyers, but it needs appreciators more. And chances are, the people inside those empty galleries want you to come in (even if they act snobby). 

And now, my galleries of note

My favorite discovery of the day: Ha Chong-Hyun at Tina Kim Gallery
"... a rough matrix of paint that is pushed through the picture plane....that broke radically with art tradition and poignantly evoked the poverty and raw physicality of postwar Korea."

Artist at a gallery that always takes my breath away: Teresita Fernández at Lehmann Maupin

Who knows how I first started following Lehmann Maupin. I think I came across their booth at an art show, loved the work but didn't do anything about it. Then I went to another show, loved the work, and looked up to see it was Lehmann Maupin. By now I know I love everything LM exhibits. Takeaway: when you find a gallery you like, join the mailing list. 

"...scale as an elastic concept, and the correlation between the immense and the intimate; the vast and the miniature; the macro and the micro."

A Breather

By now you'll be around 26th and 10th. When are you ever here? Make the most of it and head to Martha Stewart Cafe. Despite the pedigree, it's not that special. But you're here so maybe grab a tea and head back up to the Highline. 

Other places of note 

Comme des Garçons (photo on top) for black high-concept wear and also very wearable shirts and accessories with the CDG heart
HARBS for beautiful and light Japanese pastries
Printed Matter for art books (books about art and books that are art)

What did I miss? What are your favorite places in Chelsea?

Pics from the #FoodWhore NYC Launch event

I'll let the photos speak for themselves. It was a great night! 

Venue: powerHouse Arena in Dumbo, BK
Moderator: Leiti Hsu
Food: Fitzcarraldo (white bean crostini, stuffed dates, gravlax and cucumber); Mom (beef curry samosa)
Drinks: Cachaca 51
Dress: Heidi Merrick // Harness: Zana Bayne // Shoes: Marni (similar) 

See the full album here. And watch the Q&A here. 

Smorgasburg at Industry City

In my book, I may write about Manhattan exploits and designer threads, but part (most?) of me is wholly Brooklyn: maker culture, craft fairs, warehouses, and yes… artisanal products.

Back in another life, I was the Marketing & Events Director at 3rd Ward, a creative workshop in Bushwick, Brooklyn. It was basically a mega creative co-working space with a wood/metal shop, textile studio, jewelry studio, media lab, photography studios, and over 200 classes a quarter. I loved being surrounded by makers and entrepreneurs of all types, people who took a creative (not to mention financial) risk to make their mark. It was a big change for me -- I had to temporarily retire all my Manolo Blahniks. They don't do well in Bushwick warehouses -- but that BK DIY spirit became a part of my DNA.

I adore all the Brooklyn Flea/Smorgasburgs, but especially the new one in Industry City for purely nostalgic reasons. The warehouse reminds me of 3rd Ward and our annual Craft Fair (check out these pics and you'll see why). It's been open for less than a month and people aren’t quite holiday shopping yet, so the space is thankfully not too crowded.

Side note: Eric Demby, one of the Brooklyn Flea co-founders called me when he was first developing Smorgasburg (then simply “a Brooklyn Flea” but only with food). He wanted to know if 3rd Ward had any artists who’d like to contribute “an iconic piece of work” for this new project. I talked to a couple metalworkers and an inflatable sculptor, but alas nothing panned out. Still regret not becoming more involved early on. 

How much do I love this location? I went there two days in a row. Here's the weekend, in pics. 

Are you into rugs? I was skeptical, too, until I was in the market myself and got sucked into the mania. Knots per inch, silk, wool, kilim, Moroccan, Irani, Tibetan ... it's a whole world. I'm definitely not alone in this passion. The central node of this Brooklyn Flea includes these two swoony rug vendors. 

These butterfly dioramas by Flutter by Katie stopped me dead in my tracks. D and I are butterfly people (because of their beauty, grace, and metamorphosis...that is some crazy isht). These would make stunning gifts and unlike terrariums, they truly are foolproof and cannot die (RIP all my terrariums). 

But anyway, onto FOOD!

I always gravitate to Adobo Shack (the nomadic sister of Lumpia Shack in Greenwich Village). This is a brown rice bowl with chicken, coconut milk, pickled jalapenos, coconut yogurt, shrimp chips, and a fried egg. Filipino food, man. So good. Bright and brassy. Nothing murky here, just flavors as clear as a (slightly funky) bell. 

The next day, we went to Lucy's Vietnamese (I guess I was in an Asian food mood). D occasionally orders from them at work and I had to try it for myself. Due to a small ordering mix-up, we got the tofu pho and tofu banh mi. First, pho > ramen during these warm fall days. You want something cozy and nourishing, but without the slicks of fat and porky breath. Pho hits the spot. The banh mi was also great. The soft bread with the ever-so-thin-crust makes it. Next time I'd order a meat one though. 

We also had this vegan "Sloppy Jane" from Tamarack, the Smorg-arm to Willow and The Pines.  Jane, you are sloppy. This was vegetarian -- a mushroom sludge ground up and presumably cooked low and slow with tomato paste. The bun, kindly, is just as soft as its innards so as to avoid excess slop. 

I'll admit I didn't eat the following dishes, but they are duly noted for next time. 

It seems these are the Ramen Burger (which is also there) of Industry City. Behold the WOWfulls, a Hong Kong-style eggy pancake with ice cream and mochi. I'm into this whole creamy/crisp/chewy/eggy thing. Anyways I've always thought waffles are better than anything in the pancake/crepe family. 

Oaxaca Taqueria has eleven (!) locations. And yet, sadly, I haven't been to one. Despite the straight-forward name, the restaurant has a bit of a selective Korean spin. Above, a classic tlayuda/"pizza" with black bean puree, Oaxaca cheese, lettuce, cabbage, red onion, queso fresco and crema. And tacos. (Yeah, didn't pick the best Korean-influenced dishes to photograph.) 

Barbecue is well represented, with Fletcher's (left), Grandpa Val's (top right), and Monk's Meats if you wanna go vegan.

Plus, there are old-school vendors like Anthi's Greek Food and another Italian place whose name I didn't catch and I can't find online. (Help in comments?) I like seeing new Brooklyn and old Brooklyn mix like this.

On the left are "buns" from Ramen Burger. The rumors are true -- you can get them here without a line. On the right is a pan con queso from Santa Salsa (Venezuelan street food) with grilled white latin cheese, onions, cabbage, chips, ketchup, mustard, and a parsley/cilantro sauce. 

Once all the other Smorgasburgs close for the winter, I expect many vendors will move into Industry City. For now, there seems to be a disproportionally high number of hot sauce vendors and a low number of dessert vendors. There's Blue Marble, Alchemy Creamery, The Brooklyn Baking Barons, Vendome Macaron Bar, and Dough Doughnuts (above). 

Um, so I guess there are a good number of dessert vendors. But I just wanted more! Have you been to Industry City yet? Who's your favorite Smorgasburg vendor? 

Watch the #FoodWhore Q&A with Leiti Hsu at powerHouse Arena

Aagh, what an incredible, incredible night!! Thank you so much to everyone who came out. I loved seeing old friends and meeting new ones. My heart is filled with so much appreciation and love. 

For those of you who couldn't make it (or those who could and want to relive the moment), here's the entire Q&A with my friend, Leiti Hsu, host of Word of Mouth on Heritage Radio Network, plus some audience questions. I love this sort of format (as opposed to a reading) because I get to have a little fun with the crowd. 

I'll have some more stills and behind-the-scenes stuff coming soon!

I know it's pretty long, so here's a rough outline if you wanna skip and jump: 

- lowest point of writing
- how the restaurant Daniel helped me get my novel published
- how I reacted when the title FOOD WHORE was proposed to me
- how the distinctive cover art came about
- my take on the state of the restaurant review
- would I want to be the New York Times restaurant critic
- how similar am I to Tia Monroe
- how I came up with the idea of FOOD WHORE
- my background in restaurants and how I was able to get the vibe right
- have I ever dated a chef
- what the original title was
- love lessons I learned as the community director of an online dating site
- (bonus) the story of my engagement
- my writing process
- my biggest takeaways from my 3-year study under Amy Bloom
- the spectrum of insider to outsider -- where do I stand on that?

photo by @j.k0ng

What you need to know about the #FoodWhore NYC Launch Event

Tomorrow is the official Food Whore launch event! Here’s what you need to know.

• The Basics: 
  Monday, November 2
  powerHouse Arena, 37 Main Street, Dumbo, Brooklyn (just one stop into Brooklyn on the F) 
  7-9pm
  RSVP here (not necessary, but appreciated)

• PowerHouse has a history of hosting food-related book launches, including the Van Leeuwen Cookbook, the Food52 Cookbook, and Thug Kitchen, as well as fashion books like Amy Odell’s Tales from the Back Row, Simon Doonan’s The Asylum and Sophia Amoruso’s #GIRLBOSS. It's my dream venue.

• I’ll be chatting with my friend Leiti Hsu, host of Word of Mouth on Heritage Radio Network. She’s one of the hardest hustlers in the NYC food game (see: this Cosmopolitan “Get That Life” article about her) and knows restaurant culture inside out.

• Obviously, there will be food! Bites will be provided by Fitzcarraldo:

from @fitzbk

White Bean Crostino - Roasted garlic, parsley, lemon
Cucumber & Gravlax - Mascarpone, pickled shallot, black pepper
Stuffed Dates - Curried eggplant, thai basil

• There will also be drinks! Wine and cocktails from Cachaca 51. I can’t decide whether to serve this or this. What say you?

• I’ll be signing books. You can buy them at powerHouse, or you can just bring books you’ve already purchased elsewhere. (We’ve cleared this with powerHouse and they’re cool with it.) The holidays are coming and I hear the books make great gifts… especially personalized…

• You can win a sweet Food Whore x Tilit apron in a flash giveaway!

I am so completely obsessed with this exclusive Food Whore Apron, a collab with Tilit Chef Goods (who also dresses the staffs at Cosme, Blue Hill at Stone Barns, and tons of other top restaurants across the country).

For one, it’s red and black (très NYC). And then it’s the details: the handy pocket, the waxed cotton bottom half which looks almost leather-ish (and stands up to spills while still being breathable and light), proportions that flatter.

Soon, you’ll be able to buy one online. But for now -- you can win it!

HOW TO ENTER: 
Tag your Food Whore-related photos with #foodwhore, @jessica_tom and @tilit_chef_goods. And that’s it. The apron will be at the event (and of course event photos make great entries), but you don’t have to be there to win it. The contest ends on Wednesday, November 4th at midnight (it’s a flash giveaway, remember).

Nitty-Gritty:

- Your account must be public, at least to me. A private entry is no entry.  
- I’ll scour Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter for entries. Every social media network is considered one entry (ie: the same photo posted across three social media networks is three entries).
- The winner will be selected at random and contacted by the end of the week.
- You may enter multiple times.
- Photos must be be posted between 9am Sunday, November 1st and midnight Wednesday, November 4th. Photos posted before the contest announcement are not eligible.
- The apron is valued at $85 and will be shipped to the winner at no cost.

I can't wait to see all of you. 'Til then!