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Jess Tom

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Jess Tom

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Gift a Personalized Food Whore for the Holidays

December 2, 2016 Jessica Tom

If there's a food lover in your life, why not gift them with a copy of Food Whore? I'll be your accomplice in making it extra special with a signed bookplate.

First, buy the book normally online or at your local bookstore. (It's currently almost 40% off on Amazon.)  

Then email jessica@jessicatom.com with proof of purchase, any personalization instructions, and your mailing address. I'll throw in some surprise goodies, too.  All free, of course. Let me know by 12/18 so you have it in time for Christmas! 

 

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We're Married!

October 25, 2016 Jessica Tom

After four years together, one year of planning, and 100 dresses tried on and rejected... we're married! It was a smallish 100-person wedding in a quirky garden in New Hope, Pennsylvania. The day was personal and fun, and created so many memories for me, D, and all our guests. Seeing everyone together and saying our vows on a perfect autumn day made all the work and craziness worth it. 

I'll finish what I started and write more about the dress, shoes, food, and general decor. I also have thoughts on crafting your own short but meaningful ceremony, exercise and skincare regimens, and establishing a state of Zen for the final two weeks. But for now, I'll answer the top 4 questions people have.

Do you feel different? 

Since D and I live together, in some ways not much has changed. Now that wedding stuff has died down, we're back to our regularly scheduled program. But there are some differences... 

Sooner than you'd think, you'll have to use the word wife or husband. The Monday after our wedding, D had a doctor's appointment. I'm his emergency contact, but this time, under relationship, he put WIFE. Weird! 

Also, before the wedding, D was basically a stranger that I found in the universe. We were not connected by blood, upbringing, schooling. But a marriage makes an instant, unassailable connection. Maybe that's the difference between fostering a dog and adopting it. In both situations, you're eating, sleeping, and living together. The difference is once you're adopted or married, you're family. 

Are you changing your name? 

Legally, yes. Professionally, no. Some pretty cool and accomplished women already have my married name. 

Where are you going for your honeymoon? 

Australia and New Zealand in Spring 2017. We wanted to wait until our winter/their summer was over. And -- truth -- planning a wedding and an Australian honeymoon was too overwhelming, so we decided to space them out a bit. 

Who were your vendors? 

It might take me awhile to write full posts that unpack all of these roles, so here's the list upfront: 

Venue: Paxson Hill Farm
Planner: Two Little Birds
Caterer: Birchtree Catering
Cake & Desserts: Sweet T's Bakeshop 
Photographer: Weddings by Two
Videographer: Love Note Weddings
Ceremony Musicians: Rittenhouse Music
DJ: Philly Custom DJ
Dress: Truvelle purchased at Schone Bride
Shoes: Paul Andrew purchased on Moda Operandi
Reception Dress: Alice + Olivia
Reception Shoes: Fendi 
Reception Crown: China Cart
Hair & Makeup: Daneene Jensen Hair and Makeup
Floral - Personal Flowers: Pod Shop Flowers
Floral - Decor: Darlene at Paxson Hill Farm
Officiant: Our friend Claire, who has ordained for the occasion by the American Marriage Ministries

... plus a whole lotta DIY by me.

I know it's the "cool girl" thing to pretend like you don't care much about your wedding. But you know what, I care about it, and we worked hard to make it special. Getting married wasn't the pinnacle of my life's accomplishments -- far from it. But it was still an amazing, unforgettable day -- maybe the happiest day of my life. I have so much more to share. More soon! 

In Life Tags Wedding
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Our Final Wedding Tasting

August 17, 2016 Jessica Tom

People: do not sleep on the vegetarian option. 

The invites are out and reply cards are coming in. Chicken, beef. Beef, Chicken. I get it. I don't think I've ever requested the vegetarian option at any wedding, and I'm semi-vegetarian. 

I love all our entrees, but I'm most excited about the vegetarian option. At least consider it?? 

OKAY. Now that that's out of the way, onto our tasting with Birchtree Catering! We chose Birchtree because this is the type of food we love to eat: seasonal and local, expertly prepared, with clever flavors and textures.

A couple days ago, we went to their awesome kitchen in Philly for our second and final tasting. Here's what we had... 

Pumpkin agnolotti with nutmeg chili cream, frizzled sage, and toasted hazelnuts

This isn't really a summer bite. But in autumn, oh in autumn it's gonna kill. The house-made pasta is rolled to a millimeter's thickness and barely registers on the tongue. Sage, pumpkin, and toasted nuts are a nod to the season, while the chili's bite and the sage's fry steer it away from cliche. 

Mini crab cakes served with guests' choice of house tartar, cocktail, and malt vinegar aioli sauces

Crab cakes were a must for us. We always order them and have strong opinions on what makes a perfect specimen. We loved this version: low filler, high crab meat, and because it's pan- and not deep-fried, the interior herbs and veggies retain their freshness. 

Prosciutto rolls stuffed with arugula, pecorino, drizzled with olive oil

This bite reminds me of a perfect picnic. Elemental, unadorned, and very good. 

Tomato bisque with mini grilled cheese bites (above) -- I mean, come on. Every element here is a star -- the aromatic bisque, the heady blend of cheeses, and the house-made enriched sandwich bread, soft on the inside and skillet-seared on the outside. 

Solstice salad -- hearty local greens with frizzled shiitakes and shallots, asian pears, black sesame seeds and apple cider vinaigrette

This is going to be a super local salad -- everything down to the apples in the apple cider vinaigrette. I loved how this salad has depth from the mushrooms, sesame seeds, and dressing while also being quite light (which is a good thing, because there's a lot more food coming...). 

Seared skirt steak served at a perfect medium with chimichurri over confit potatoes, slow roasted local tomatoes

At our last tasting, we had the more traditional version of this with demi-glace. It was the type of dish you'd have at a Parisian bistro -- homey but elevated. This time around, we wanted to sample a dish with more pow. This is a meat-and-potatoes dish, yes, but the vibrant chimichurri also has kale and the roasted local tomatoes are bursting with sweet and savory juices. This is like the jock who you later learn plays the oboe and volunteers at a community garden. 

Short rib bricks braised and roasted in bourbon, spice, herbs, with herbed shaved tuscan kale and delicate squash planks, house steak frites

Surprising, right? You expect the short-rib-and-fries dish to be served with a rustic plopping. But I love the how this is so tidy, a present that you just want to rip open. The short rib was super tender and, because it wasn't on the bone, you could simply knife your way down to the plate and get a perfect bite. 

Wild mushroom manicotti with leeks, house ricotta, three basil béchamel with rainbow chard and hickory nuts 

This. This was so good. Like so good I was way stuffed by this point, but I still ate all of this. This might be my favorite pasta dish of all time. It's earthy, rich, creamy, bright, crunchy (those chard stems still had some bite to them), and nutty. It was like a dish engineered to make people swoon. 

To guests: get what you want. But consider the vegetarian dish, too! I wouldn't give you a perfunctory meh vegetarian dish. You know that, right? 

Anyway, this is NOT the final menu, just a peek at what we had the final tasting. I'll leave the actual menu a surprise. 

I will say that I think we built a menu of delicious crowd-pleasers. It's like a playlist. This is not the time to show off your esoteric musical taste. Give the people Livin' On a Prayer.

The Birchtree kitchen is in an awesome building filled with other artists and makers called Global Dye Works. The space used to be a yarn-dying factory and still retains much of its equipment. 

The area on the way to the kitchen and tasting room has a sort of cartoony industrial quality. Think: the factory in Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, but less frightening. Birchtree is transforming the space into an official event venue and we're going to try to go to a supper club there once things calm down. 

Menu selection is definitely the best part of wedding planning. I'll take this over dress shopping any day. 

In Life Tags Wedding
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Wedding Odds & Ends: Hairpieces, Clutches & Lingerie

August 12, 2016 Jessica Tom

Okay, TWO MONTHS to go until the wedding! 

What’s done: all the major fun vendors. Venue, caterer, cake baker, DJ, ceremony musicians, florist, rehearsal dinner location and caterer, videographer, photographer, hair/makeup artist, invites, planner. And of course the dress and shoes. 

Plus all the nuts-and-bolts vendors: tent, transportation, and restroom trailer. 

Now all that’s left are making decisions with said vendors: finalizing menus, playlist, placement. And a whole host of small details, little things that no vendor totally owns unless you get a full-blown event designer (which we did not get). 

If you look at wedding checklists, you’ll see a ridiculous amount of to-dos. We’ve been working off this checklist from The Knot, but first eliminated anything that seemed like padding. 

Wedding planning is overwhelming already, and I couldn’t deal with “select a caterer” being the same prioritization level as “select your perfume”. (do you feel me #PlannerPorn peeps?) 

But we’re in the home stretch and here’s where the small things become important. But small and miscellaneous can be fun. Here are some things on my mind…

(I’ve checked some of these off my list, but won’t show the things I got here.) 

HAIR ORNAMENTS

I got mine at Bridal Garden, which is a non-profit bridal boutique in NYC that accepts donated gowns and accessories from designers, showrooms, and brides. All proceeds benefit Brooklyn Charter Schools.

I was all for buying a sample or “once-loved” wedding gown, but the competition is pretty stiff and inventory is limited (or brown, or missing a lot of beadwork). You have to be very, very open-minded and patient. Apparently I am not that.

But accessories are another story. There’s no deadline (a custom dress must be purchased 6-12 months in advance) and at least for me there was no pressure to get a DREAM hairpiece...whatever that means. Vintage was an easy decision, and it’s a huge bonus that I also got to help BK kids as well.

But if you’re looking for more ideas beyond your local vintage bridal store, BHLDN has choice selections, including the pearly baby’s-breath-like halo above. Over on Etsy, Erica Elizabeth Designs makes delicate wisps with metal and stone. I like this one that also includes enamel. Jennifer Behr designs, like this crystal headwrap, are very regal.

And if you’re feeling spendy and loopy in equal measure, there’s always this Dolce & Gabbana lemon tiara (and you can wear it to a Beyonce concert, too!).

GARTER

No. This was one tradition I easily crossed off my list.

WEDDING JEWELRY

Without giving too much away...dangly earrings and a necklace would be overkill with my dress. But I still need some flair. My jewelry taste tends more towards the art-and-craftsy… Marni over Cartier. But my shoes are already what you might call “eclectic”, so I’ll do low-key jewels for this one day.

I’m searching for diamond studs with a jacket. The jackets will add pizzazz on the wedding, and I can just wear the studs for everyday. I'll likely stick with costume jewelry for a bracelet though. Even for special occasions, I'd opt for some twine/clay/wood concoction. I'm pretty sure I'd never wear a jeweled bracelet beyond that one day. 

WEDDING CLUTCH

Will I even use a purse? Carrying a purse on your wedding seems so...prosaic. Is it cruel to ask your bridesmaid to hold your lipstick, a compact and maybe your phone and breathmints? And be at your beck-and-call? Perhaps.

So a clutch. It should be nice and should match, but if you’re like me, it will just get thrown with all your other random bags and won’t be a Treasured Item.

In college, I took a class on Buddhism and though I don’t remember most of it, I remember the idea of non-attachment. Things weigh us down (says the girl with multiple shopping posts). You will drive yourself crazy getting sentimental over every single thing.

I love the look of the Rafe faceted shell clutch above, and bonus points because it can be your “something blue”. More reasonably, these tassel and rhinestone netting clutches from Charming Charlie are sparkly and will get the job done with style--and cash to spare.

WEDDING COVER-UP

The wedding is in mid-October, so it will likely get chilly at the end of the night. Let’s just say that my dress has proportions and detailing that require a certain kind of cover-up.

I have reservations about buying fur new, but a vintage fur bolero or stole is always chic. Check out TheRealReal for great deals that won’t make you ethically uneasy, like this winter white fox fur stole.

If my gown were simpler, I’d go with a beaded cover-up. Your Dream Dress carries discounted designer dresses that are new, overbuys, or samples (ie: never worn by a bride at a wedding). And the designers are top-notch. I love this blousy Amsale bolero and this intricately beaded and embroidered Monique Lhuillier.

(side note: when buying “once-loved” items, you may want to work with a store/site that can vouch for every single item. As in, there’s a 3rd party that has confirmed quality and can protect you if the item is not as pristine as you’d like. That’s the case with all the vintage/consignment shops I’ve listed in this post.)    

There’s fur...there’s beading/embroidery...and then there are FEATHERS, like this puffball with wayward wisps.  

Guess which direction I’m going??

WEDDING NIGHT

I’m not great at buying sexy lingerie. On a recent trip to La Perla, I went straight to the caftan section like the old woman I am.

So I was excited when the minxes at Unbound sent me their Bride to Be Box, which includes the musts: a peek-a-boo bra (top photo) and side-tie bottoms. They’re by Hanky Panky, so I know they’re comfortable (see: old woman reference above).

And then there are next level things that I would never think to buy but are amazing to receive: gold mesh bracelets/handcuffs (!), a feather tickler (!!), and a diamond vibrator with 21 settings (!!!).

This would be a great gift for friends to give to a bride for a bridal shower or bachelorette. I really love the idea of Unbound. The items are all sexy, classy, and the right blend of edgy/editorial/romantic… Dita Von Teese meets Dover Street Market meets Anthropology. How cool is this stick-on mask?

At some point I’ll write about the rest: miscellaneous logistics stuff like welcome signs, telling people where they can sit (this seems minor, but people want to be directed), and you know… VOWS.

But, yeah, we’re excited and keeping relatively sane. I often come back to another Buddhist-like mantra: mind like water. React appropriately to the force and mass of the input. Then return to calm. Namaste.

In Life Tags Wedding, Life, fashion
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Watch my episode of Cooks vs Cons, Candy Clash

July 15, 2016 Jessica Tom

It took some time, but my episode of Cooks vs Cons can now be viewed on Food Network. You'll need a cable log-in.

Here's a snippet (actually a pastiche of two recipes... some backstage knowledge for ya):

In Life Tags Cooks vs Cons, TV
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Our Italian Vacation Part 2: Amalfi Coast

June 22, 2016 Jessica Tom
Positano

Okay, I’m going to sound a little hippie-ish here. The best vacations are holistic vacations.

\hō-ˈlis-tik\ characterized by comprehension of the parts of something as intimately interconnected and explicable only by reference to the whole

I’m not talking meditation and acupuncture...but rather looking at the balance of travel. To me, a perfect vacation has contrast, a yin and yang.

City and country. Site-seeing and relaxation. Touristy and living like a local.

We started vacation in Rome, pushing ourselves to see and eat everything possible. And then after a quick train ride and taxi ... a gear shift. Something calmer, brighter, just as stunning but in a different way. 

Why Amalfi? Well, it wasn't up to us. Dave's friends decided to forego a wedding in favor of a stunning villa on the Mediterranean with 20 of their closest friends (cue: face palm and wedding planning regret). 

The place was incredible. In the photo on the above left, the villa is the taller building, from the top roof deck to the in-sea lounging area to the terraced patios gilded with fig trees, bougainvillea, herbs, succulents, and more. 

Amalfi Coast-6.jpg

Relaxation took many forms. Napping on the roof deck. Crosswords on the main entertaining deck. Bocce on the...activity deck. Reading in the lemon grove. You get the point. You can even contract a boat to pick you up at the foot of the villa (but alas the sea was too choppy so our boat days were cancelled--twice). 

We did some site-seeing, but at a more leisurely pace than our Roman look-and-leave. One thing a day instead of seven. On our first day, we went to Hercalaneum, a smaller, more well-to-do city than Pompeii that met the same fate when Mount Vesuvius erupted in 79 AD.

Italy is impossibly beautiful, but not just because of the manmade. After ruins aplenty, we hiked the Path of the Gods from Agerolo to Positano, a walk that combines everything you could want: sky, sea, greenery, flowers, mountains, forest and wildlife. 

The contrast extended to food, too. There are a zillion ways to slice this, but here's a start. Casual and high-end. Traditional and experimental. Planned and spontaneous.

In some ways, I think living in Rome wouldn't be that different from living in NYC. But the Amalfi Coast felt more relaxed, possibly by necessity. You can't rush anywhere on those hairpin turns on the coast. The photos above are from Amalfi, a 40-minute walk from our villa. I was ready to do a day of market-ing and cooking, but alas the walk was a bit far and more importantly, harrowing, given there's no sidewalk and every turn is a blind turn.  

And unsurprisingly, possibly the best meal of the trip wasn't at some Michelin-starred restaurant, but a home-cooked meal at the villa by Marguerite, the villa's mamma-bird and housekeeper.

We had: eggplant parmigiana, stewed zucchini, panzanella, bruschetta, lemon pasta, shrimp risotto, sea bass en papillote with olives and capers, and cake with custard cream and fresh fruit. 

(Side story: when we asked if the eggplant had cheese, Marguerite reassured us, no cheese, only mozzarella!) 

Did I love it because it was homey and personal, that I didn't have to look it up on some blog or Google Maps? Did I love it because we were sitting with friends, new and old? Did I love it because it was a refreshing change, a contrast? Yes, yes, yes.

A common term you'll hear in Italy is tipico. As in, typical. To foreign ears, this may sound like an insult. "Typical frat boy", "typical boss rant"... something like that. But in Italy, it's a label of pride. 

Up in the hills of Nocelle, the last point on the Path of the Gods until you make the 1,700 steps to Positano, we had an unlikely hike pit stop at Ristorante Santa Croce of meats, cheeses, fish and soup, all served on white tablecloths and the prettiest of plates. Of note: the tipico fiordilatte, a type of mozzarella prized in this region. 

The famed Amalfi (aka Sfusato) lemon is everywhere: in orchards on the way to limoncello, in backyards, on servingware, in granita (so good), and in cakes, yogurt, pastries, you name it. I picked lemons from the villa's grove for multiple pitchers of mint lemonade and can attest that these fresh lemons are something else: more fragrant, more delicate, less acidic than our American ones. 

Cheese and carbs were our common thread in Rome. Lemons, arugula, and seafood were the refrain in Amalfi. 

We enjoyed our last dinner at Il Giardiniello in Minori. 

And what do you know, the salad was nothing more than arugula, spicier and more herb-like than what we have here, and a wedge of Amalfi lemon. 

Il Giardiniello Minori

We followed in Amalfi tipico fashion: fried anchovies stuffed with smoked mozzarella, fish wrapped in eggplant like a present, seared Mediterranean tuna, and great mounds of Minorese gnocchi, made with flour, ricotta and eggs. 

Naturally, we had to get the lemon delight, a vanilla-lemon sponge covered in a dome of lemon cream. And of course, tiramisu. Again. For balance. 

AT A GLANCE

Where to stay: 
Dimora di Mare
Via Carusiello, 28, 84010 Ravello
Perfect for a large group and/or special occasion. They even host weddings. But otherwise, there are plenty of smaller villa options here.

Where to eat: 
Ristorante Giardiniello
Corso Vittorio Emanuele, 17, 84010 Minori

Ristorante Santa Croce
Via Nocelle, 19, Nocelle 84017 Positano

any lemon granita stand in Positano

In Life Tags Italy, travel, pasta
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Our Italian Vacation Part 1: Rome

June 19, 2016 Jessica Tom

I adore Rome. Where else you can encounter ancient ruins down the street from the Missoni store, a celebrity pizzaiolo in the shadow of the Vatican, and casual beauty where even the neighborhood convenience store drips with jasmine vines?

We came to Italy to celebrate a friend’s wedding on the Amalfi Coast (more on that later), but first we had to spend a couple days in the Eternal City. 

This was my third time in Rome and D’s first, so our two day/ two night stay included a full sweep of all the major sites, some quieter neighborhood spots, plus lots of time for wandering. 

Colosseum

If you have two days, I’d recommend a combination of these three groups.

GROUP 1: The Biggies - Colosseum, Roman Forum/Palatine Hill, Pantheon, Trevi Fountain, Vatican. These are must-see destinations for the first-timer. Warning: there will be LINES, particularly at the Vatican and Colosseum. 

GROUP 2: The On-the-Ways - Piazza Navona, Spanish Steps, Villa Borghese. These are also special, but if you’re short on time, you can probably do without. Chances are, you’ll be in those neighborhoods anyway, so you can stop by. 

GROUP 3: The Wanderables - My favorite part of any trip: discovering where locals really live, work, and of course--eat. Trastevere is boho yet refined, a neighborhood that twinkles with charm. Testaccio is laid-back and home to satisfying, unpretentious restaurants. And Prati! What it lacks in elegance, it makes up for in the best pizza on the planet. 

Here are some picks from Group 3.

Mercato di Campagna Amica Circo Massimo

Mercato di Campagna Amica Circo Massimo

Rome is not as compact as NYC, but you really should walk everywhere because there are surprises around every corner. Case in point: this buzzing farmer's market just down the street from our hotel. That porchetta was our first bite in Rome and it was just what we needed to awaken our airport-dulled appetites.

Beyond the Iced Coffee

Yes, I know all about your nitro coffee and cold brew. But when it's hot, the Italians know where it's at. I first fell in love with the shakerato in 2009, when I was in Puglia for a spell. I've since ordered it at every top Italian coffee shop in NYC (Eataly, Tarallucci e Vino, and... Blue Bottle) and no one gets close. A shakerato **must** be foamy on top. Don't ask me how it works -- the ingredients are only ice, espresso, and simple syrup -- but it's magic, like a hyper caffeinated root beer float. Shakerato above is from Sant'Eustachio. 

And I know you're in Italy for the gelato ... I get it! But save room for another creamy cold treat: the granita. Consider: icy shards of espresso, scoops of barely-sweetened cream, and a generous drizzle of chocolate. Like all Italian coffee, you don't take this to-go. You stop and enjoy it. Granita above is from Bar del Cappuccino. 

Flavio al Velavevodetto

flavio al velavevodetto
flavio al velavevodetto
flavio al velavevodetto

I almost never repeat anything. Books, movies, restaurants, recipes. Life is too short, the list of options is long. Why dwell on one thing? Well, for one, because some things are really, really good. 

We loved Flavio al Velavevodetto the first night. The food wasn't anything we hadn't seen before -- caponata, zucchini with mint and garlic, ricotta ravioli, meatballs -- and yet each dish was dialed into a different, more delicious register. The ravioli dough was daringly al dente, the ricotta wet and milky, the tomatoes somehow deep and bright and sweet all at once. Flavio has been a foodie fav ever since Carlo Petrini, the founder of the Slow Food Movement, sang its praises. 

And so I buried my FOMO and went to the same place for dinner, two nights in a row. 

Flavio al Velavevodetto

Reader, it was worth it. (Shown above: roasted padrón peppers, escarole with capers and raisins, fettuccine with green beans, pesto and potatoes, beef rollatini, tiramisu) 

Bonci Pizzarium

But man cannot live on vegetables, pasta, and espresso alone. There must be pizza. 

I first learned about Pizzarium from my friend Pam Yung, who did a pop-up collab with Bonci just one week before my trip. Pam is a breadmaking goddess who has earned well-deserved acclaim for her desserts and bread program at her restaurant, Semilla. Her partner (in life and business) José Ramírez-Ruiz is a vegetable-whisperer. Any place that hosts these two is a place I'm sure to like. 

And boy, did I. 

Bonci Pizzarium
Bonci Pizzarium

Pizza is a multi-faceted thing. And I am but one small person in a giant universe. But from my POV, this is the best pizza in the world. 

Gabriele Bonci uses natural sourdough starters (one that dates back to WWI), resulting in the platonic ideal of pizza crust. I always thought I liked thin crust, but what's infinitely better is a crust of medium height, airy and elastic inside and crackling and crisp on the bottom. Imagine the lift and depth of a sourdough, the crunch of a cracker, and the savory je ne sais quoi of a baguette. 

And that's just the dough. 

Pizzarium serves up to 20 different flavor combinations a day. Lucky for you, the pizza is al taglio, or by the kilo. You can sample a little sliver of tomato, sweet onion and Pecorino ... or squash blossoms and ricotta ... or tiles of potato ... or tuna and arugula ... or broccolini and mortadella ... or ...

I overheard one woman say, "I could die here." Same, sister.

And, oh yeah!

There's another reason I was in Italy -- I have a book coming out this week! (same book, different language). Check it out here. Vita Segreta di Una Gourmet hits stores June 23.

Next up... part two of our vacation ... the Amalfi Coast. (sneak peeks on my Instagram) 

At a Glance


Where to stay:
Kolbe Hotel
I picked this hotel because it was sandwiched between the Colosseum (touristy), Palatine Hill (serene) and Testaccio (neighborhoody). The airy, spacious hotel is in a former convent, and like many things in Rome, is a pleasing blend of new and old. 
Via di S. Teodoro, 48, 00186 Roma, Italy

Where to eat:
Flavio al Velavevodetto
Via di Monte Testaccio, 97, 00153 Roma, Italy

Bonci Pizzarium
Via della Meloria 43, 00136 Rome, Italy

Frigidarium (gelato)
Via del Governo Vecchio, 112, 00186 Roma, Italy

Where to caffeinate: 
Sant'Eustacchio 
Piazza Sant'Eustachio 82, 00186 Rome, Italy
Yes, I know this place is touristy, but it only got that way because the coffee is so good

Bar del Cappuccino
Via Arenula, 50, 00186 Rome, Italy
Totally unassuming (even ugly), but serves a memorable, perfect cappuccino

In Life Tags restaurants, travel, pasta, pizza, Italy
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Ancillary Wedding Dress Search: The Cheongsam

May 26, 2016 Jessica Tom

In Chinese culture, you're supposed to change gowns for every wedding banquet course. That could be seven to ten dresses.

While I typically love license for costume changes, that's even too much for me. And given what I did for my wedding dress...that times ten equals psychotic levels of shopping. 

But I do like the idea of some Chinese element at our wedding. Typically brides will go to their nearest Chinatown and get a custom cheongsam made, a dress that can cost $700 or more. That's not bad for a custom gown with high-quality silk and hand embroidery...but it's a lot for a look you'll likely never wear again. Why not spend that money on a dress that's Chinese-y enough and is also wearable? 

And so begins my search. 

The Reefy MINI

This Mary Katrantzou has the look of Chinese embroidery, but takes it in a more abstract, aquatic direction. Mary Katrantzou Embellished Tulle Minidress

Note: Though it's not uncommon to see Chinese-American brides wear a white cheongsam, white is the color of death in Chinese culture, reserved for funerals and not weddings. 

The SHAPE-SHIFTER

Here are all the hallmarks of a traditional cheongsam: the dainty collar, the keyhole at the neckline, the slim fit and the high slit. And yet, it's also pretty versatile and could be worn anywhere without feeling costume-y or I-tried-too-hard. Michael Kors Cap Sleeve Twist Front Gown

The Velvet Aboveground

Red: good fortune and joy. Blue: calmness, trust, immortality. Dial those to jewel tones with some bead embellishments and you have this. Emilio Pucci Appliquéd Lace Minidress.

The RED LACE Lady

If I were to sketch a gown for a custom dressmaker, I'd probably do something like this. A Chinese-y pattern in a simple shape (with a dose of sexiness because, c'mon). Alice + Olivia Roxie Lace Diamond-back Dress

The ME Dress

If I weren't concerned about getting an extra-ordinary dress, I'd get this. It's rather subversive as a wedding cheongsam. The colors and patterns are in the right realm, but the silhouette is all wrong. A cheongsam is supposed to hug your curves, while this one distorts them, squishing your boobs and puffing your hips. This doll-like silhouette is a very common shape in my closet, but probably isn't **special** enough. Erdem Black & Red Embroidered Katja Dress

What do you think of adding cultural elements to your wedding wardrobe? How did you find your dress? 

Photo above: Maggie Cheung in In the Mood for Love

In Life Tags fashion, Ancillary Wedding Dress Search, Wedding
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Cooks vs Cons Round 2: Korean Beef with Toasted Quinoa, Quick Pickles & Miso Egg Emulsion

April 19, 2016 Jessica Tom

Round 2...candy! Oh boy. I don't know about you, but I've never cooked with candy before. As Bruno and Geoffrey Zakarian pointed out, it's hard to know how candy will cook. Will it melt? Hold its shape? Curdle? 

I once tried to brûlé gummy bears and it was a disaster. The heat seems to toughen the gelatin, making an impossibly tacky bite. 

So instead of opting for licorice, gumdrops, or  jelly beans, which contain mysterious ingredients with unknown properties, I used clean and simple lollipops. Sugar, flavoring and coloring. Not ideal, but not horrifying either. 

We weren't allowed to make desserts (too easy), so my mind immediately went to Korean food. Korean food is actually pretty sweet, but it's tempered by salt, spice and funk. No one-note sweetness here. I called on my go-to flavors: miso, soy, ginger, garlic and sesame (the same flavors that are in one my most popular recipes of all time). I chose pink lemonade and lemon lollipops, thinking that citrus flavors were better than, say, cherry or grape (gag). 

Once I knew how I'd feature the surprise ingredient, I worked from there. What works best with sweet and spicy marinated beef? 

Bibimbap! Concepting the rest was easy. I'd adapt the classic Korean rice-and-veggies dish with my own spin. A quick pickle added some brightness and crunch, toasted quinoa with nori contributed an earthy, umami base (and mimicked the delicious burnt rice in the bottom of a stone bibimbap bowl). I also made a miso-egg emulsion, a hollandaise-like sauce that nods to the raw egg that is traditionally stirred into bibimbop. 

The recipe below is sequenced for a tight 30-minute cook. There's no wasted time waiting for things to cook. But if you want a saner experience, then you can always make each component one by one.

RECIPE:

Beef: 
1/2 cup of sugar -- ground-up citrus candy or actual sugar
1 small onion
8 cloves of garlic
1 ping-pong-ball-sized knob of ginger
1/3 cup soy sauce
2 tablespoons sesame oil
1 Scotch Bonnet chili 

1 lb thinly sliced top sirloin 

Toasted Quinoa: 
1 cup red quinoa
10 sheets of roasted seaweed

Quick Pickles:
4 radishes
3 baby cucumbers
1 tablespoon salt 

Miso Egg Emulsion:
4 egg yolks
1 heaping teaspoon miso paste
1 teaspoon rice vinegar
½ teaspoon chili powder
1 tablespoon butter 

2 tablespoons black sesame seed
¼ cup chopped chives

Rinse quinoa and place in pot with two cups of water. Bring to a boil on high, then cover and simmer on low until nice and fluffy. The "tails" of the quinoa should be sticking out. (This didn't happen during my episode... perhaps because the stove was so hot the water boiled off too quickly and/or the quinoa was old and took longer than normal to "bloom".) 

For the marinade, blend the onion, garlic, ginger, soy sauce, sesame oil and chili. Place in saucepan and reduce on medium-high. 

For the miso egg emulsion, blend the egg yolks, miso, rice vinegar, chili powder and butter. 

For the quick pickles, slice the cucumbers and radishes with a mandolin on the thinnest setting. Salt and let rest. 

Slice the beef and place it in the reduced marinade. While the beef is cooking and picking up the glaze, toast half the quinoa in a frying pan with a teaspoon of olive oil. Add the other half of the quinoa, add sliced nori and reserve. 

Assemble your plate. Squeeze out the excess water from the pickles and place. Add the toasted quinoa with nori and Korean candy beef. Pour miso egg emulsion on top, or serve on the side. Add chopped chives and black sesame seeds. 

RELAX because that was an intense 30 minutes of cooking.

In Recipes by Ingredient, Recipes by Type, Food & Recipes Tags Cooks vs Cons, TV, Beef, Meat, Main Course, Korean, Quinoa, Seaweed, Sesame, Garlic, Ginger, Soy Sauce, Eggs, Miso
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TFW People Guess Your #CooksvsCons Identity on Twitter

April 18, 2016 Jessica Tom

I tried out for Cooks vs Cons because I'm an armchair chef. Why are you making croutons and bread pudding on Chopped? Don't you know that's so overdone? Were you thinking you could avoid making dessert on Top Chef?  

And, I also have a thing for high-stakes deception (Exhibit A). Even if I wasn't a contestant on Cooks vs Cons, I'd still be obsessed with it. 

So, if you haven't gathered by now, here's now the show works. Two professional chefs and two amateur chefs compete in two rounds with surprise ingredients. No one -- not the judges, host, or contestants -- knows who is who. The audience is kept in the dark too, and they can guess along with Graham Elliot, Daphne Oz, and Geoffrey Zakarian. 

Turns out seeing people speculate about your identity on Twitter is really surreal. 

A lot of people thought I was a chef, including Graham Elliot and Daphne Oz (I think GZ was onto me, even though I made sure to call him Chef as a real chef would). Twitter thought so too. 

Jessica is the only one I'm sure of! Pro! #CooksVsCons

— TEAM TRINA (@Trinas_No1_Fan) April 15, 2016

Jessica and Mariano are the cooks #CooksVsCons

— Yolanda Moultrie (@yotmo28) April 15, 2016

#CooksVsCons Jessica is definitively a pro!

— Me (@KastoffCloud) April 15, 2016

I think Mariano is a con who is just used to making pasta. Jessica & Bruno are real cooks #CooksVsCons

— MyThoughtsMyTime (@nmills1012) April 15, 2016

I think the cooks are Peter and Jessica #CooksVsCons

— 805Collectibles (@805Collectibles) April 15, 2016

When I watch the show, I assume everyone is a chef until proven guilty. Could be a lack of conviction when talking about a dish, or a loosey-goosey way of moving around the kitchen. Sometimes it's easy to get caught up in cliches, but then you realize that the producers know that, so you end up engineering some reverse reverse psychology that hurts your brain. 

ie: That guy has a lot of tattoos so he must be a chef. But the producers must realize that so of course he's not. But maybe they know that I know...  

And so on. 

And then some people thought I was a fraud. My instinct is to be insulted, but then I remember...I am a fraud. 

@FoodNetwork Jessica is a con #CooksVsCons I think she's just using her brain👌👌

— Northphillyreese (@Northphillyrees) April 15, 2016

Jessica is a con, she's probably a lawyer. #CooksVsCons

— redruM (@Phoenix90247) April 15, 2016

@gzchef Jessica is an executive business woman- con

— Meilani (@MeilaniGore) April 15, 2016

I also think Jessica's real occupation is an actress. #CooksVsCons

— Seraphim Taylor (@SeraphimTaylor) April 15, 2016

Actress, businesswoman, and lawyer are not bad guesses. After the competition, Graham Elliot said he thought I could be a knowledgeable food blogger. That's pretty close, too. Novelist is way too random for anyone to guess. 

I love that this show has two layers of challenges: one for the contestant and one for the viewer. I can't think of anything quite like it -- watching your own funeral? Witnessing your college admissions panel? Something where your personhood is analyzed as if you weren't there...but you are. 

But that makes it sound like a drag. It was weird and fun and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. 

Also -- Cooks vs Cons has been picked up for a second season! That means they're looking for amateur and professional cooks. Take a look at the casting notice here and catch up on all my Cooks vs Cons posts here. 

BTW, my bio footage was shot at PowerHouse Arena, where I had my launch party. 

In Life Tags Cooks vs Cons, TV
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Everything I was thinking during Cooks vs Cons

April 17, 2016 Jessica Tom

The Cooks vs Cons shoot was a looong day -- 14 hours. There's a lot of waiting, some napping efforts, some eating (I ordered sashimi for dinner, not realizing that nothing-but-raw-fish is probably the last thing you want when your nerves are at peak levels). 

You film many things multiple times, but the actual cooking only happens once. On a day that can move in slo-mo, those rounds went so super fast. 

A lot of it was a blur, but here's a taste of what I was thinking during those gone-in-a-flash 30-minute rounds.

Corn!! Corn is really one my favorite foods. This is good.
Corn!! Corn is really one my favorite foods. This is good.
I'm really only running 15 feet, but I am all about that head start.
I'm really only running 15 feet, but I am all about that head start.
My nails are definitely chipped. I should have gotten a gel mani.
My nails are definitely chipped. I should have gotten a gel mani.
The moment you realize you should've used fresh corn is the moment you pour canned corn into a blender. No. Turning. Back.
The moment you realize you should've used fresh corn is the moment you pour canned corn into a blender. No. Turning. Back.
Overmix gnocchi and you get a gummy glob. Undermix it and you might have pockets of flour. Sometimes you don't really know until it's too late.
Overmix gnocchi and you get a gummy glob. Undermix it and you might have pockets of flour. Sometimes you don't really know until it's too late.
No wasted motion. Carry all the things.
No wasted motion. Carry all the things.
I'm not used to the power of a professional stove. The water in my quinoa is boiling off before it can cook.
I'm not used to the power of a professional stove. The water in my quinoa is boiling off before it can cook.
Quin-womp-womp in process.
Quin-womp-womp in process.
Chef, I like you and you always have snazzy sport coats, but I can't really talk right now.
Chef, I like you and you always have snazzy sport coats, but I can't really talk right now.
I'm going to look so attractive eating on TV, right? Right??
I'm going to look so attractive eating on TV, right? Right??
I'm plating and I have five whole minutes left. Is this a good thing... or bad?
I'm plating and I have five whole minutes left. Is this a good thing... or bad?
This dish is really good. Better than a lollipop beef dish has any right to be. But can it win??
This dish is really good. Better than a lollipop beef dish has any right to be. But can it win??
The finals. I know this sounds lame and I talk a big "I'm so competitive" talk. But I already feel like a winner.
The finals. I know this sounds lame and I talk a big "I'm so competitive" talk. But I already feel like a winner.
Corn!! Corn is really one my favorite foods. This is good. I'm really only running 15 feet, but I am all about that head start. My nails are definitely chipped. I should have gotten a gel mani. The moment you realize you should've used fresh corn is the moment you pour canned corn into a blender. No. Turning. Back. Overmix gnocchi and you get a gummy glob. Undermix it and you might have pockets of flour. Sometimes you don't really know until it's too late. No wasted motion. Carry all the things. I'm not used to the power of a professional stove. The water in my quinoa is boiling off before it can cook. Quin-womp-womp in process. Chef, I like you and you always have snazzy sport coats, but I can't really talk right now. I'm going to look so attractive eating on TV, right? Right?? I'm plating and I have five whole minutes left. Is this a good thing... or bad? This dish is really good. Better than a lollipop beef dish has any right to be. But can it win?? The finals. I know this sounds lame and I talk a big "I'm so competitive" talk. But I already feel like a winner.

And ICYMI, I posted the recipe for my Round 1 polenta gnocchi with creamy corn soubise here. Round 2 recipe coming soon... 

In Life Tags Cooks vs Cons, TV
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Cooks vs Cons Round 1: Polenta Gnocchi with Creamy Corn Soubise

April 15, 2016 Jessica Tom
Jessica Tom cooks vs cons gnocchi soubise
Jessica Cooks vs Cons

When Geoffrey Zakarian announced we had to make pasta for the first round of Cooks vs Cons...I wasn't very excited. 

I'll occasionally eat pasta when I'm out to dinner, but I rarely make it at home and when I do, it's always dried pasta or sometimes pre-made fresh ravioli. I know I must make fresh pasta. This has been ingrained in me after years of watching cooking shows. 

But I do have one pasta recipe up my sleeve: gnocchi. With some adjustments, I thought I could make it a 30-minute version, with some extra time for a dynamic, complex sauce. 

My first trick was adding polenta to the dough. Usually pasta dough needs ~30 minutes for the gluten bonds to form, but I had no such luxury. So I added instant polenta, which creates instant dough "glue". Bonus points because corn is the surprise ingredient and of course polenta is cornmeal. 

My second trick was to make an onion soubise. I first had soubise at Momofuku Ko, in a now-iconic poached egg with caviar and potato chips dish. A soubise traditionally calls for softened onions and cream or bechamel. But what about using corn as a not-too-rich thickener?? I gave it a try, and it worked! 

And finally, corn and pasta are both soft and starchy. Where's the pop? So I added chipotle puree to the dough, along with ground annatto seeds for color. I swapped the traditional Parmesan with Mexican cotija, to keep with the Mexican flavors. I also added some tortilla chips and popcorn for texture. 

This was a tough round, especially since I don't really make or eat pasta. But these gnocchi may make it into my everyday rotation...

Jessica Tom Cooks vs Cons

POLENTA GNOCCHI WITH CREAMY CORN SOUBISE RECIPE

Jessica Tom cooks vs cons

Gnocchi: 
¾ cup ricotta cheese
3 tablespoons grated cotija cheese
2 tablespoons potato flour
1 ½ tablespoons instant polenta
1 ½ tablespoons flour + extra for rolling
2 tablespoons chipotle puree
1 tablespoon ground annatto seeds
1 whole egg
1 egg yolk
semolina flour for gnocchi dusting
salt 

Soubise: 
2 tablespoons butter
2 large Vidalia onions
2 teaspoons ground cumin
1 teaspoon dried oregano
1 tablespoon white wine vinegar
¾ cup heavy cream
1 cup of corn
salt / pepper

Garnish:
cilantro
tortilla chips
popcorn
sumac
chili powder 

Sandwich the ricotta between four paper towels to soak up excess water. Salt your pasta water and bring to a boil. 

Melt butter in a saute pan. Slice onions and add, along with cumin, oregano and salt. (If you want to do this under 30 minutes, I recommend using a mandolin to sweat the onions faster. Slice the onions directly over the pan.) Sweat the onions until semi-translucent, about 7 minutes. 

Mix the ricotta, cotija cheese, potato flour, flour, polenta, chipotle puree, annatto and eggs. Form into a dough. Roll into snakes a little wider than your finger and cut into 3/4" slices with a bench scraper. 

Add the sauteed onions to a blender and add the cream, corn, white wine vinegar and salt to taste. This is your creamy corn soubise.

Add the gnocchis to the salted boiled water. Remove with a spider or slotted spoon when they float at the top for about 30 seconds. 

Place gnocchi in a bowl and add onion soubise plus cilantro, sumac, chili powder, more corn, sumac, crushed tortilla chips, and chili powder. Or not! The judges weren't fans of all the fixins, and I kind of agree. But at home, it's up to you. 

Jessica Tom Cooks vs Cons polenta gnocchi

In Recipes by Ingredient, Recipes by Type, Food & Recipes Tags Cooks vs Cons, TV, pasta, gnocchi, Corn, Popcorn, Chipotle, Herbs, Vegetarian, Main Course
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My Appearance on Cooks vs Cons on Food Network

April 15, 2016 Jessica Tom

That whole experience was so so so fun. I'll write more later (the recipes for my chipotle gnocchi with creamy corn soubise & Korean BBQ beef with red quinoa, quick pickles, and miso egg emnulsion, my behind-the-scenes thoughts), but for now just wanted to tell you other airing times. 

The episode is called "Candy Clash". Check here for the most up-to-date airing schedule.

To my Canadian friends, the show will air on May 2. 

Hope you enjoy!! What was your favorite moment from the episode? 

In Life Tags TV, Cooks vs Cons
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Kumquat Carrot Cake Muffins

April 12, 2016 Jessica Tom
Kumquat Carrot Cake Muffin-7.jpg

Like clockwork. Every time the weather warms up a little, I get an urge to bake. 

Am I self-sabotaging before bikini season? Seeking heat inside to match the heat outside? Or maybe...it's all in my head. 

But alas, here we are, daffodils a-peepin', cherry blossoms a-blossomin', and me. A bakin'. 

These came about because D thought he liked kumquats even though I had never seen him eat a kumquat and he doesn't like very sour or bitter things. Nevermind! We bought a whole sackful at a raucous grocery store in Flushing. 

Turns out D doesn't like kumquats... and so we were left with three pounds of kumquats and two stomachs that couldn't quite take them eaten whole. 

So here we are, the kumquat carrot cake muffin. These are strictly more muffin than cake. I wanted to round out the assertiveness of the kumquat while still keeping its essential character -- ie: not throwing a lot of sugar at it. I used coconut and turbinado sugar for texture and a sweet musty complexity. But if sugar is what you want, do it! That's what jam is for. 

RECIPE: 

2 cups kumquats, seeded and sliced

2 tablespoons butter
¼ cup coconut sugar 

¾ cup vegetable oil
⅛ cup white sugar
⅞ cup turbinado sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract 

3 large eggs 

2 cups flour
1 teaspoon cinnamon
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 ½ teaspoons kosher salt 

3 cups grated carrots
1 cup raisins
½ cups walnuts (optional) 

Preheat oven to 400 degrees Fahrenheit. Cut and seed the kumquats. Place in saucepan with butter and sugar. Simmer on medium until the kumquats are soft and pliant, about 6 minutes. 

Using the paddle attachment of a mixer, blend the oil, sugars, and vanilla extract. Add eggs one by one until mixed. In a separate bowl, mix the flour, cinnamon, baking soda and salt. While the mixer is on medium, slowly add half the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients. Add the carrots, raisins, and walnuts. Add the rest of the dry ingredients and mix until just blended.

Grease a muffin pan. Spoon the kumquat mixture so it just coats the bottom. Add the carrot cake batter into each cup about 80% full. Bake for 10 minutes at 400 degrees, then reduce to 350. Bake until an inserted toothpick comes out clean. Large muffin tins will bake in about 25-30 minutes. A small muffin tin will bake in about 15-20 minutes. Cool completely before removing from the tin. 

Eat in your preferred fashion. Here I had some with a dollop of Rhubarb and Meiwa Kumquat jam from Sqirl. 

In Food & Recipes, Recipes by Ingredient, Recipes by Type Tags Baking, Muffin, Citrus, Kumquat, Carrot, Cake, Breakfast
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Shoes for An Outdoor Wedding

April 10, 2016 Jessica Tom

So, I have the dress... now it's time to think about shoes (or, more precisely, flag the shoes I like so I can buy them when they're on sale). 

Here's a trick with your wedding budget. You have to count everything that's a one-time expense. Flowers, food, tent, entertainment...and that dress. 

But shoes! Here's where you can get a little creative with your accounting. IMO, you don't have to count shoes if you'll wear them again. They're a wedding write-off. (Same goes for your wedding ring.) 

So while you might be tempted by uber bridal shoes like this or this, those might as well be flower crowns because you probably won't wear them again. Unless you're looking for a museum piece, why not go for something a little more versatile. 

Here are the shoes I'm considering for my October, outdoor wedding. Stilettos are out because of the grass. Ethereal elements like feathers are out because I want these to last. Wedges are out because they feel a bit too casual, too Jess circa 1999. What's in? Sturdy, chunky heels and a little bit of humor/edginess/jolie laide (to offset that whole "princess" vibe). 

Lasers and Mirrors

Love the modern romance of these shoes. Plus, I wonder if the heel reflects the grass, so it looks like you're floating upon a golden aura? Nicholas Kirkwood Leda Sandal

The Grown-UP Jellies

Yes, these are PVC. But you can wear them in the rain and look at that diamond-like lucite heel. These are kooky and practical(ish) while also being bridal. Simone Rocha Faceted Heel Sandal

The Rainforest Cafe

 

We don't really have colors. The wedding is simply "botanical" and these study yet sexy heels fit the bill. Monique Lhuillier Satin Ava Sandal

The Disco Blush

Blush without being babyish. Marni One Band Glitter Sandals

The Oyster

On a day when you're performing in front of everyone you care about, it's nice to have a little secret of your own. Nicholas Kirkwood Champagne Meava Pearl Sandal

The Blue Suede Shoes

I hate the word "tacky" as it relates to weddings. The classy/tacky spectrum is slippery and fraught. Just do whatever you want and the people who love you won't care anyway. But these shoes are gloriously, knowingly tacky and I love them for it. J. Crew Collection Embellished Sandals

Here are allll the shoes I'm considering at the moment. What's your favorite? What shoes did you/will you wear at your outdoor wedding? 

In Life Tags Wedding, fashion, Shoes
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Poetry // The Invitation by Oriah

April 5, 2016 Jessica Tom

This is a bit too intense for a wedding ceremony reading, but man, I love it. 

The Invitation

by Oriah

It doesn’t interest me
what you do for a living.
I want to know
what you ache for
and if you dare to dream
of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me
how old you are.
I want to know
if you will risk
looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn’t interest me
what planets are
squaring your moon…
I want to know
if you have touched
the centre of your own sorrow
if you have been opened
by life’s betrayals
or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain.
I want to know
if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.
I want to know
if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you
to the tips of your fingers and toes
without cautioning us
to be careful
to be realistic
to remember the limitations
of being human.
It doesn’t interest me
if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear
the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.
I want to know
if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
“Yes.”
It doesn’t interest me
to know where you live
or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.
It doesn’t interest me
who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the centre of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.
It doesn’t interest me
where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know
what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.
I want to know
if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like
the company you keep
in the empty moments.

In Life, Writing Tags Inspo, Writing/Publishing, Poetry, Wedding
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Wedding Dress Search: The gowns that were almost The One

March 29, 2016 Jessica Tom

Ok... you've seen the "weird" ones...the ones that were gorgeous but offbase for various reasons. Today I'm showing the contenders, the dresses I seriously considered. Here goes. 

(btw, the Reem Acra above is pretty... but was never really in the running. I'm not a fan of dropped waists...even if they're dropped only by an inch.) 

THE CUTE EDITORIAL ONE

This was cute but also subversive, unblingy but also luxuriously, meticulously made. Maybe you could call it adorkable (my Kleinfeld stylist would tell you no, please don't call it adorkable). This dress felt the most "me" as I am everyday, as opposed to my nebulous Bride Persona. Amsale Lake Gown. Similar here (I want this one as a rehearsal dinner dress).

The OVERGROWN V-NECK

Pretty! And with such a nice, soft, flowy skirt. Though, what a difference skin color makes. Ivy & Aster Secret Garden. 

THE APPLIQUE A-LINE

I grabbed this one even though it was exactly what I didn't want: the princessy puff. But I couldn't resist the floral applique detailing and beadwork on the bottom (a kind of starry beaded connect-the-dots that you can't see here). From the short time I was in it, I could tell it was also a comfy dress, one you could dance, eat, and hug in. BHLDN Ariane Gown. Similar here (actually, very very similar, such that the Ariane is likely a direct rip-off and ultimately why I didn't want to go with a company that's known for doing this to indie designers). 

THE DAISY CHAIN BUSTIER

This dress amused me, with its sweet daisy straps and neckline... and then a bustier bodice and SEE-THROUGH side panels (yes, I am wearing black underwear in this pic). This had a Rihanna-esque pretty but DGAF attitude. The fit is a bit off here...the cups weren't really cupping the right areas... but you get the idea. Tara Keeley 2501 Gown.  Similar for everyday here.  

THE WEEPING WILLOW

You've seen the Glamour Closet dressing room a lot. That's because my like-to-try-on ratio was very high here. They carry A-list designers (Vera Wang, Elie Saab, Naeem Khan, Reem Acra, Carolina Herrera, Mira Zwillinger, Lela Rose)... but because the dresses are all samples or discontinued styles, they're 50-75% off. Maybe that's why I liked so many of them, too. 

Anyway, that means that the selection can be a little oddball and the good, au courant stuff (plunging V, illusion necklines) goes fast. This Oscar de la Renta had the sweetheart/strapless/ballgown look that I was avoiding, but the leafy applique bottom made up for it. This was the first dress where I did that happy skirt swish you see before a bride gives the word on Say Yes to the Dress. Oscar de la Renta 44E16.

The Simple Slink

Ah, and you thought I was all botanical appliques! This looks body-con in a potentially worrisome way, but in fact this whole genre of dress is pretty flattering. There's no boxy top, just a heavy skirt that pulls on a clingy bodice that's little more than illusion netting, flesh-colored cups, and lace. Instantly form-fitting, with enough weight to smooth out your curves. Martina Liana 775 Gown.

Which brings me to...

The BETTER-FROM-THE-BACK dress 

This Maison Signore shares the same basic mechanics as the Simple Slink dress, except there's more lace, more sheer panels, and more butt-hugging. Those Italians sure know how to treat and appreciate a woman's body (to the tune of 1.1K likes when this pic was reposted on Maison Signore's Facebook page. Yikes!). I couldn't find the exact dress online, but this Maison Signore is close. 

Reminder... I already have my dress. Have you guessed what it looks like now? (Here are all the posts in the series if you need to catch up.) A slightly kooky comfy sheath with botanical appliques and minimal bling? Sorry, but that's not how it worked out. 

What was your favorite dress? 

In Life Tags Wedding, Wedding Dress Search, fashion
4 Comments

Wedding Dress Search: The ones I'd love to own, but aren't right for the occasion

March 23, 2016 Jessica Tom
Kelly Faetini Bree

Last week I showed you the "weird" ones, the dresses that had a unique POV. Those were dresses that I'd wear to a fashiony event. 

These dresses are more versatile... beautiful, glamorous gowns that are pretty much without fault. It's not them, it's me...and our venue...and that gut reaction of "this is pretty and I want it, but not for the wedding." 

The photo above is the Kelly Faetini Bree dress. I went into this whole dress saga knowing that I didn't want a strapless gown with a sweetheart neckline. So we added lace arm bunting (not the correct bridal term) and it transformed the dress from pretty but mildly forgettable into something with a more sultry silhouette. The thing about side bunting is that your arms are literally on lace leashes. You can make the bunting detachable, but then you're at sweetheart/strapless square one. 

THE CHUNKY LACE COLUMN 

BHLDN jolie gown

Funny thing about wedding psychosis. You go in thinking you want a certain kind of unfussy, unblingy dress. A normal dress that happens to be white. This BHLDN Catherine Deane gown fits that description. It's easy, elegant, botanical. But somewhere along the line, I convinced myself that the dress needed to be more Bridal (I'll take my kool-aid on ice, thank you). And so this one was a miss. BHLDN Jolie Gown. (Also, curiously, available in navy for $500 more... you'd think it'd be the other way around, but maybe they are constructed differently.) 

THE LEAFY COLLAR 

A long-sleeved wedding dress? So chic. And one with pretty but not precious appliques? I'm sold...almost. I'm a mover and a stretcher, and if I'm going to wear a dress for 9+ hours, it should be pretty comfortable. Despite reassurance that I would not "hulk out" of this dress, I had to take it out of the running. Rue de Seine Roxy Gown. Similar here and here.

The GATSBY MERMAID

I would get this dress in a heartbeat if we were getting married in a ballroom or loft space or restaurant. Anywhere but a garden. The cut and weight of the beading is ridiculously flattering. In the picture above, I'm not trying to mimic the model (I hadn't seen the photo yet). I'm just wondering where my tummy went. Victor Harper Couture 289. Similar here.

THE VERY SEXY WORK DRESS 

I told my bridal salon stylist that this looked like a very sexy work dress and she asked me..."where do you work???" (From home, so what do I know.) Maybe it's the cap sleeve and hardy lace. Or maybe it's my questionable work attire (when I used to work in an office). This had a nice ease to it and the back was also killer, but it didn't have the air of specialness I wanted. Alyne Adella Gown. Similar here and here. 

Btw, you already know this... but you can pin a million pics on Pinterest, but you have to put the dress on! These don't even look like the same dress to me. 

THE RIBBON LATTICE WATERFALL 

If you can divorce yourself from the mania, you might be able to see: these dresses are works of art. Tony Ward is a Beirut-based couturier who uses the most unusual fabrics. I tried on a dress with a modern/romantic Chantilly lace-meets-Pollock. Another with a skirt pinched with floral ridges, like engraved silk. This was a lattice of ribbon that criss-crossed over the bodice, then flowed into a round, full skirt. Up close, this is a stunner. Tony Ward Astagale Gown. Similar here. 

Oh, and guess what?? I got my dress this past weekend! I went with my mom to Schone Bride, a mere 12-minute walk from our apartment and conveniently close to Four and Twenty Blackbirds and Fletcher's. Do wedding dresses go with pie and barbecue? Not really, but between those two places and its Brooklyn DNA, this salon and The Dress feel right. 

I'm still planning on posting other pics... dresses that were almost The One, and possibly "dresses that looked good on models but look terrible on me" ... but come to think of it, not sure why I would do that last one. 

In Life Tags Wedding, Wedding Dress Search, fashion
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We have a wedding caterer!

March 21, 2016 Jessica Tom
Birchtree Catering via lovemedophotography

Birchtree Catering via lovemedophotography

I care about food. People know I care about food. People I care about...care about food. So wedding catering is a huge decision and was a bit stressful (though tastings were a ton of fun). 

I'm happy to report that we officially booked our caterer, Birchtree Catering!! Here's what won us over at our tasting. 

Striped vegetable canapes - chive bread, salted cucumber, French breakfast radish, creme fraiche, dill 

Like high tea in a garden. Which is exactly the vibe we're going for in our venue.  

Hen of the woods tarts - Kennett Square mushrooms, house ricotta, pecorino, caramelized onion, herbs 

The only thing worse than perfunctory carbs is perfunctory pastry. You know, that greasy cup that's clearly just a vehicle for whatever's inside. Find me at a cocktail party and I am the shameless person with the plateful of licked-clean pastry. Well this was not that. The pastry was fresh, an essential player rather than a boring stage. 

Chicken shumai with lemongrass and malagueta chili oil

I like the idea of including some Chinese flavors in the menu, if only because they are cozy and familiar to me. But my mother, who doesn't mince words, says if my family wanted Chinese food, they'd go to a Chinese restaurant. 

Lemon capon with roasted lemon, almonds and oven roasted olives, with ricotta gnudi and winter greens 

Capons are the eunuchs of the poultry world. The lack of sex organs result in a less gamey taste (but who ever said chicken was gamey?) and meat that is more moist, tender and flavorful than hens or un-castrated chickens. Probably TMI. 

Anyway, true to its breeding, this was super tender and flavorful. The lemon and olives brought acidity and bite. The gnudi was a surprise too. When I think of gnudi, I think of April Bloomfield's ricotta clouds. As my dad said, these were like mini knishes (high praise for him). 

Smoky hanger steak with demi-glace, roasted sunchokes, frizzled maitake mushrooms, charred baby rainbow carrots 

I know this plate looks kinda empty. But keep in mind, this is a tasting portion and we are really really stuffed by now. This was a solid meat dish, but we'll likely go with a red meat selection with more pow (like the skirt steak with chimichurri) or perhaps the bourbon braised short ribs. 

Food is the most important deciding factor, but we also knew Birchtree was the one for us because of their care, competence and culture fit. Even their office in Global Dye Works reminded us of 195 Morgan, where I worked from 2010-2012 as the Marketing & Events Director of 3rd Ward, and where Dave works now, in a weird coincidence (different company though). 

Now we have to figure out our service style (family style? plated? a hybrid) and finalize the menu. I have an image of no centerpieces...just giant platters of vibrant, delicious food. Flowers are great, but they're no food. 

In Life Tags Wedding, Birchtree
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Introducing...Author Website Services

March 18, 2016 Jessica Tom

I'm not gonna name names, but some author websites are so bad. So, so bad. 

Patterns and colors that hurt your eyes. Layouts that feature all the wrong things. Weird effects that are just glitchy and annoying. 

And the thing is: many of these are custom, expensive sites that can't easily be altered by the author. So when you're paying a designer by the hour, you're stuck with a website that's either a money-suck or an embarrassment. 

I didn't want that for myself. So I built my site -- this site -- all on my own, using what I've learned as a marketer, creative director, and community director. I thought about what I would want as a modern, design-conscious author. Color, clarity, personality. 

Once I had my site built, I worked on numbers-based marketing (analytics, ad buys, email capture), as well as content marketing ("sticky" recipe and publishing posts, content partnerships, product collaborations, community cultivation). 

Turns out, I like this side of the author life and other people in the publishing industry told me that my approach was on the money. They wanted to know if I could do the same for them or their clients. 

Well... now I can. Starting today I'm offering Author Website Services. My core services are website design, branding, and debut author launch strategy, but I can do any of the stuff I listed above. You can learn more and reach out to me here. 

And seriously. Say no to bad author sites! 

In Writing Tags Writing/Publishing, Author Website Services
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